Etiquette while eating. Table etiquette for children and adults: eating, table setting and rules of behavior

Dinner events are an exam for each person on knowledge of etiquette and good manners. It’s hard to imagine modern life without going to a restaurant or visiting. Compliance with the rules will help both the guest and the host of the event appear in society as a well-mannered individual with properly instilled communication skills.

What it is?

Often the concepts of “ethics” and “etiquette” are equated or combined. Ethics has a broader meaning; when talking about it, one should keep in mind the personal moral values ​​of the individual. Such human traits are cultivated from early childhood. Typically, the depth and strength of an individual’s morality depend on interpersonal relationships in the family (family model), methods of education, efforts educational institutions aimed at instilling good manners in schoolchildren, a friendly environment, and personal character traits.

Etiquette is a set of specific rules that any well-bred person must adhere to., these are norms of behavior accepted by society for society as a whole or for a specific individual in particular. You can be a highly moral person with extremely correct moral values, but not know good manners. And vice versa.

Table etiquette is the rules of how a person should behave in a restaurant, guests, at a picnic, the order of relationships between men and women, people of different ranks and ages at such events.

Any educated person should know the basics table etiquette. Anyone who wants to achieve certain heights in life, get promoted on the career ladder, or get into high social circles must learn and follow the rules of good manners thoroughly.

Standards and regulations

You can identify the basic elements of how you should behave during a feast. Such rules are known and understandable for both children and adults. Therefore, you should start instilling good manners in yourself and the younger generation from the following basics:

• Compliance with etiquette proxemics. Proper placement of guests at the table is important. Thus, the host of the event has a place at the head of the table, all important, honorary and senior guests are seated near the host on the right and left hand, youth and children are at the opposite end of the table. Sometimes the youngest are given a separate children's table.
• It is very important to monitor what intonation prevails in the voice during a conversation, the timbre, volume, tone, and speed of speech. The voice should sound clear, you should not speak too quickly, and loud exclamations are unacceptable. You can't talk with your mouth full.
• At the table you need to watch your gestures and posture. You cannot lounge on a chair, put your elbows on the table, sit with your cheek resting with your hand, cross your legs, or wave your arms, especially if they are holding instruments.
• At the table you cannot start a conversation that could provoke an argument. Politics, religion, health and money are closed topics of conversation. You also cannot discuss your diet, alcohol restrictions, or foods you are allergic to. You should silently set aside the inappropriate dish and replace alcohol with any other drink.

• A linen napkin should be spread on your lap, this will prevent your clothes from becoming dirty, and you will also have the opportunity to discreetly wipe your hands on it.
• You can start eating when everyone has food on their plates, and also after the host of the holiday starts the meal.
• If while eating you come across a piece that is impossible to chew or a bone, you should discreetly bring the napkin to your lips and remove the inedible element.
• During the feast, you should turn off your phone or put it on silent mode. Under no circumstances should you place it next to the plate on the table.
• A woman should place her handbag or clutch on a chair behind her, and a large bag on the floor or hang it on the back of a chair. Sometimes restaurants offer a special chair for bags, you can use it. You cannot even put bags and packages on the table for a while.
• If cutlery or food falls on the floor, you should not focus on this; you need to call the waiter and ask him to bring a new one. You cannot bend under the table and pick up a fallen object.
• Do not use a toothpick dining table. When there is a pause in the conversation, you need to apologize and leave the table. You can remove a stuck piece of food in the restroom.

The host of the event should not place toothpicks on the dining table; their place during the feast is the bathroom. The same rule applies if there is a need to clear your nose. Blowing your nose at the table while eating is indecent, and this gesture will also be unpleasant for other guests.

Good manners for a meal

Before going to an event, you should become more aware of the nature of the event. This can help in choosing an outfit, and for women – also in choosing hairstyle and makeup.

If the event is of an official nature, most likely all guests were offered programs. They usually indicate the start time, the time of the entertainment or official part, the time of the buffet and the end of the evening.

Informal gatherings are often more intimate and relaxed. Men can neglect ties, and ladies wear floor-length evening dresses. However, this does not exempt you from observing etiquette at the table.

A date in a restaurant: rules for a man and a woman

Usually, at the entrance to the restaurant, guests are greeted by a hostess or head waiter. An employee of the establishment offers his customers free tables and calls the waiter to take the order. If such a position is not available, you can ask any waiter to help you find a place or decide on your own. The man accompanies his lady to her place, usually on the left, and helps her sit on a chair.

• The waiter brings the menu and gives guests time to make a choice. The right of primacy in choosing a dish belongs to the woman. That being said, there is a common mistake that women often make. It is absolutely forbidden to say “Order something to suit your taste.” Correct interpretation – “Please advise what is best to order? "
• The man makes the order to the waiter after listening to the woman’s wishes.
• Girls should not choose dishes that are too cheap, as this may hint to a man that, in her opinion, he is not wealthy enough. But choosing the most expensive dishes for a woman can cause unnecessary speculation.

• The specifics of the restaurant should be taken into account. If the event takes place in a restaurant Mediterranean cuisine, no need to order borscht or dumplings.
• If the choice is difficult, you can call the waiter, clarify what ingredients are present in the dish, what is the cooking time.
• You should not address the waiter first name; usually the employees of the establishment have a name badge with their name written on it.
• While waiting for an order, you should start a small talk. The topic of the conversation should be general; you should not go into details or go deeper. The interlocutors should look each other in the eyes, speak quietly so as not to disturb others, and also create an intimate atmosphere for the date.
• While the dishes are being prepared, the waiter may bring a bottle of wine as an aperitif. A male guest should not uncork it himself, nor should he pour the drink. This is the waiter's job. There is no need to wait for the waiter to pour a second glass. The lady is served first, then the man can pour himself a drink. The glass should be filled a little less than halfway.
• The glass should be held by the stem with three fingers. Thus, it will remain as clean as possible, and this is important for the aesthetic component, which is key to the concept of etiquette.

• To notify the waiter about a change of dish, you need to place cutlery diagonally on top of the plate. A fork and knife connected at the free end indicate that the meal is not over yet. It should be remembered that it is strictly forbidden to put cutlery on the table after use; their place is only on the plate.
• You should not try your partner's dish. The only way to know what it tastes like is to order one.
• In a restaurant, it is customary to eat slowly, enjoying the taste and the process. Even if the feeling of hunger is very strong, you should follow your partner’s pace, otherwise he will perceive this as an escape or a desire to quickly leave the restaurant.
• When dinner is finished, the napkin is placed to the left of the plate.
• The gentleman pays first. A woman should not interfere, asking “How much?” “or try to pay for your half by putting money into the man’s pocket.
• If a man and a woman have a friendly relationship, it is possible to pay the check 50/50, then the man, having examined the check, tells the woman the amount of her order, and they agree on a tip.

A business meeting

IN modern world Very often business meetings take place in restaurants and cafes. This is especially true during international visits in the interests of business. The receiving party introduces the partners to the customs and culture of their country. In this case, the invited party should familiarize themselves with the traditions before the event so as not to offend their partners. Generally speaking, the following rules must be observed:

• First of all, a business meeting is a solution to a business issue. If it does not take place at lunchtime, then you should limit yourself to a cup of coffee or tea.
• When meeting with a partner, you should adhere to the main principle: time is money. You can begin to resolve the issue immediately after the greeting, without being distracted by small talk.
• After discussing the issue, you should briefly summarize the meeting; if there is time left, move on to abstract topics in order to maintain personal relationships.
• During international feasts, the inviting party pays. If a business meeting is limited to coffee or tea, then everyone pays for themselves.

Customs of different countries of the world

Historically, food intake different nations the world took shape in its own way, taking into account national characteristics, everyday life, the influence of conquerors, cultural and historical facts. In many countries, the rules of table etiquette overlap with each other. Thus, a general international etiquette can be identified, but there is always room for originality.

In Russia

Russia is a large international country in which pan-European norms of behavior at the table have been officially adopted. However, given that there are more than 190 nationalities in our country, when traveling around it, you can encounter unusual traditions and norms of behavior at the table.

The Tatars place great importance on etiquette at the table. The head of the family starts the meal first, only then the rest of the family members and guests. They leave the table only when the head of the family has left. Praise is offered to Allah before and after meals.

The peoples of the Caucasus have other characteristics. Each family member has his own role, which must be respected without controversy. It is worth noting an important feature: men and women in the Caucasus do not eat together at the same table. Men eat food first, only then women and children.

Any large feast in the Caucasus must have a manager - a “toastmaster”. The oldest and most honored guest of the event can become a toastmaster. He makes toasts and gives others the right to speak. A Caucasian feast without toast is not a feast. They are distinguished by extraordinary pomp and exaltation of the master's merits.

Among the Mongolian and Buryat peoples, a guest at the table is first offered a bowl of tea or vodka. The guest, having taken the bowl, must put it in the drink thumb right hand and sprinkle it towards the fireplace. It is interesting that this custom has actually been preserved in some places to this day. Of course, the customs of many nations are gradually weakening, and more and more families are beginning to adhere to European standards of etiquette.

However, when traveling across vast Russia, you should study the peculiarities of life of the local residents before heading to one or another corner of the vast homeland. This knowledge is necessary in order not to offend or offend the hosts, as well as to show respect for their culture and traditions.

In France

For those lucky enough to receive an invitation to dinner in France, it’s worth knowing:

• Lunch and dinner in France always begins with an aperitif; it is selected depending on the region. The French don’t need a reason to drink a glass of wine; they start drinking wine as early as adolescence. The wine is selected strictly for the dish that is expected. If it is fish - dry white wine, meat - dry red.
• The French usually eat out, as they don’t usually cook. Cafes, bistros and restaurants host meetings with friends, relatives, and just family dinners. Sometimes men and women visit cafes to drink a cup of coffee and read a book or newspaper.
• The French also love family holiday dinners. They usually consist of several servings, each of which contains several dishes. The feeding process itself is carried out from right to left.
• While guests are being served a new dish, you should not keep your hands under the table or on your knees - such a gesture can be regarded as distrust. You should lower your wrists to the corner of the tabletop.
• Large feasts among close friends and relatives are held with complex table settings, and all generally accepted norms of etiquette are observed.

• You should be careful when using spices. You shouldn’t be too zealous - this may offend the hostess or cook, as it can assume that you didn’t like the dish, that they want to “embellish” it.
• In France, it is not customary to ask for more wine or a change of wine. The French believe that only a specific wine can be consumed with a specific dish. Also, do not add ice to a glass of wine. Temperature changes will affect the experience of the drink, and melting ice will change the taste.

In general, French etiquette has the same basic aspects as in Russia and throughout Europe. In the customs of this country, it is not customary to rush, so the French are very attentive to all table rules and strictly follow them; a guest of this country must also show respect for the culture and remember etiquette.

In England

The British are very scrupulous about observing etiquette, especially at the table. Even among close friends and relatives, dinner follows all the rules of good manners. It can be said that The main rule of etiquette in England is adherence to etiquette.

At the table you should use utensils according to their intended purpose. The knife is held strictly in the right hand, the fork in the left. It is not allowed to rearrange the cutlery; in addition, the sharp end of the knife and fork always faces towards the plate.

An unusual rule, but if the invited guest is allergic to any ingredient or has special food requirements, the hosts should be notified 2 days before the event. At a large table in England it is unacceptable to have an intimate conversation with only one guest, The topic should be common to everyone, and you should not contact a stranger.

You should not reach across the table to take any dish; you should ask for it to be passed. However, you are also not supposed to pass it back; you need to place the plate in an empty space next to you.

Each time a new dish is served to a guest, you should say “thank you.” If there is a common dish on the table, you should not put too much on your plate, you need to put enough so that after the end of the feast the plate is clean. Otherwise, the owner may think that the guest did not like the dish.

In Korea

In Korea, it is also not customary to leave uneaten rice or too much of another dish on your plate. Also, you should not use a spoon and chopsticks at the same time, stir the soup with utensils, select certain pieces and separate them from the main dish. Everyone needs to finish lunch at the same time.

Sometimes in Korean restaurants the waiter serves the table without leaving the table. His task is to ensure that guests always have food on their plates. Therefore, a satiated guest needs to leave a small piece of the uneaten dish, which will be a signal that the supplement is no longer required. The same rule applies to drinks.

After the end of the feast, the chopsticks or spoon should be returned to their original position, where they were before the start of the event. The eldest person at the table usually pays the bill, rather than everyone paying for themselves.

In China

The Chinese are very jealous of their traditions and customs, strictly follow them themselves and are very happy when foreign guests try to adhere to them.

The Chinese begin their meal with flower tea. This drink acts as an aperitif and also entertains the crowd until the rest of the invited guests arrive.

The Chinese, like the Russians, love to toast and drink alcohol at the table. During the toast, you must stand, and then lightly clink the edges of your glasses. You can only drink from a full container; if the glass is half empty, you should wait until the person responsible for pouring the drinks fills it.

The Chinese will be very pleased if foreign guests use chopsticks while eating. Moreover, it is not at all necessary to hold them correctly. Both convenient and correct. However, it is very uncivil to use such a traditional device for other purposes. You should not use sticks as a pointer, chew them, or just put them in your mouth. During breaks between dishes, chopsticks are placed on a special stand; they cannot be left on the plate, and sticking them into food is offensive.

First, the first courses are served - soups, which are the only portions, then the “main food” - rice or noodles, and the evening ends with dessert. You shouldn’t eat too much and overeat; a feast in China is an occasion to taste different dishes and enjoy their taste.

In Turkey

Turkey's national customs are gradually being replaced under Western influence. Restaurants and behavior there have completely adopted the rules of international etiquette. But in Turkish houses you can still encounter the fact that the owners observe the peculiarities of life that personify the history of the country.

For those who were invited to visit, you should know:

• When entering a Turkish house, you should take off your shoes on the threshold in front of the door. It is unacceptable to enter a house or apartment wearing street shoes.
• Turks eat at a low round table, sit cross-legged on the floor, with their feet hidden under the tabletop.
• You should never refuse food offered, as this may offend the hosts. You should try at least a small piece and praise the dish.
• Turks serve common dishes on a tray. Each guest fills his plate with his hand or spoon. You should not choose “better” pieces - this is also indecent.
• The meal should begin after the approval of the head of the family.
• The feast usually lasts at least two hours. Turks follow the order of dishes, so after the main serving there is a serving of tea, coffee, and sweets. They eat leisurely, enjoying the process.
• It’s also not worth staying for a long time visiting. You should politely thank them for lunch or dinner and leave.

Compliance with generally accepted international rules of etiquette is the best proof of good upbringing. Any country in the world will appreciate good manners. Tourists and foreigners are often forgiven for not knowing the peculiarities of the country’s traditions and way of life, but they should not abuse their position.

There are several rules that should be followed when visiting another country or in an unfamiliar company:

• You can bring dessert for tea and give it to the hostess when you meet;
• You should not sit down at the table before the host invites you;
• You should not start eating before the owner starts;
• There is no need to build a mountain of food on your plate; it is better to put a little of each dish, eat it, and only then reach for more. This method will protect you from overeating and will also allow you to leave your plate clean;
• Don't ask too many questions to the hosts or other guests;
• You should always be modest and friendly, be sure to thank the owners and note the culinary talent of the hostess.

In a difficult and incomprehensible situation, adhere to the principle of common sense. The main task is not to cause inconvenience to others, even if you have to sacrifice your well-being.

Dining etiquette is not limited to just food rules. This concept includes the ability to make a favorable impression on others, the manner of communication, and much more. By these criteria you can always distinguish a well-mannered person. Few people know all the intricacies of table etiquette, but there is nothing to be ashamed of. There are many manuals and articles devoted to etiquette. And it's never too late to learn.

Basic table manners

The rules of human behavior at the table can be called a whole science; they have been developed over years, even centuries, and are based on common sense, hygiene, attitude towards people who share a meal with you, etc. This section of etiquette is perhaps the most important, because Without good table manners it is impossible to succeed in life. Table etiquette is studied in modern business schools and colleges, where future businessmen are trained.

Now we will look at the basic rules of behavior at the table. A man should not sit down at the table until the women sit down or one of the hosts offers to take a seat. As a rule, the man escorts the woman to the table and offers her a seat to his right. And only after that can he sit down himself. He should pay his main attention to the woman sitting on his right, but if a woman is also sitting to his left, then she should not be deprived of his attention. In general, according to the rules, a man must be equally attentive at the table, both to women he knows and to those he does not know.

So, the guests are at the table. But you shouldn’t start eating until everyone has filled their plates. This applies to the first course. When submitting the next one, you do not need to wait until it is offered to everyone. Ladies sitting at the table should be served first. The lady sitting to your right should pour the wine with her left hand. When a new bottle is opened, the man must pour some wine into his glass and then into the lady's.

It is completely unacceptable to place your elbows on the table, because... You can push your neighbor or his appliance. Elbows, if possible, should be kept close to the body. Only hands can be on the table. You also need to remember about posture. You should not lean over the plate. If the desired dish or object is far from you, you cannot reach for it, dipping parts of your clothing into other people's plates. You need to politely ask them to be handed over to you.

When lunch has come to an end, the fork and knife should be placed on the plate parallel to each other, in such a way that if you imagine the plate as a clock dial, and the cutlery as hands, then they should show the time “ten to four.” In decent establishments, this serves as a signal to the waiter that you have already finished your meal. But he should not put the cutlery away until everyone has finished eating. If you finish eating before the others, then in the remaining time you do not need to move the plate away from you, put them one on top of the other, you can continue the conversation, drink coffee or tea. By the way, about tea. Do not leave a teaspoon in a glass or cup. After you have stirred your tea or coffee, you should put it on a saucer. In no case is it recommended to urge your dining companions on with words or gestures. In turn, if you are used to eating slowly, then at a business lunch it would be better not to finish eating than to force everyone to wait for you.

The rules strictly prohibit making comments regarding the dishes served or criticizing their execution. When the women rise from the table, the man must also rise and stand until they leave the dining room. Then you can sit down.

Another very important rule. Basically, when serving, food is served on the table in common dishes: salad bowls, dishes, plates, which are designed for several people. Food from such dishes must be taken carefully, using special devices that lie next to her (various forks, spatulas, tongs, spoons). You must try not to drop anything on the table or touch your plate with these utensils. There is no need to pile mountains of food on your plate, it looks ugly. After all, you can always add more of the dish you like. Smearing and kneading food on your plate also looks unaesthetic. This can make others at the table feel disgusted.

Rules of communication at the table

First of all, you need to remember that you shouldn’t talk about business at the table. The conversation should be pleasant and general. If the number of participants is small, then general topics for conversation are chosen; if there are more than thirty guests, then, as a rule, those sitting next to each other talk with each other. The feast lasts on average about two hours, and after it you can talk about business.

There are certain taboos on topics of table conversation. Namely: health (your own or someone else’s), income, family problems, work conflicts. Also, you should not pronounce too long monologues, or be interested in the age and social status of your interlocutors. It is recommended to talk about culture and art, but avoid going deep into the topics to avoid the possibility of an argument or conflict.

It is not permissible to conduct conversations over the heads of those sitting next to you. If you want to say something to a person sitting across from you, you can do this by leaning back, behind your neighbor’s back. When talking to the person sitting on your right, you should not completely turn your back to the person sitting to your left. The ability to listen to your interlocutor is also an important condition for good manners. You cannot interrupt the speaker, you must look at him with attention, showing your interest in the topic of conversation with your whole appearance.

And one last thing. Never talk while food is in your mouth, and also, do not lounge imposingly on a chair.

Serving items.

For a person accustomed to making do with a minimum amount of cutlery, it is sometimes not an easy task to understand the purpose of numerous shiny knives and forks laid out on festive table at his plate.

In fact, everything is not so difficult. We must remember that all devices are divided into main and auxiliary. The main ones are those that are used to eat, and the auxiliary ones are intended for cutting something, putting it on, etc. And further. All cutlery is placed from your plate in the same order in which the dishes are served: soup, meat, fish, dessert. Thus, you should use the device that is furthest from the plate first.

Despite the apparent variety of serving, each item has its own purpose. At the beginning of lunch, there is a snack plate in front of you (sometimes a small dinner plate with a snack plate on it). On the left side of it there may be a paper napkin or a pie plate. Knives are laid out to the right of the plate, forks are laid out on the left side. Dessert cutlery is placed in front of the plate. Behind them are glasses, glasses, wine glasses. There is a napkin on the snack plate in front of you. If lunch involves no first course, a spoon is not included.

It would be correct to hold with your right hand all the devices that are on the right, respectively, with your left – those on the left. Dessert cutlery is taken with the hand towards which the handle of the cutlery is located.

The knife should be held correctly so that the middle and thumb hold it by the sides of the beginning of the handle, the end of the handle rests against the palm, the index finger should be kept on the upper surface of the handle so that it can be used to press the knife down when you need to cut something off. The remaining fingers should be kept slightly bent. Food is cut towards you. But there should not be too many pieces and they should be small in size so that they fit in the mouth.

The fork is taken in the left hand so that the end of the handle rests against the palm, and the fork itself faces down with its tines. Otherwise, it is held in the same way as a knife, only with the left hand. If there are side dishes on the table such as mashed potatoes or porridge, the fork is used as a spoon, i.e. turn over with the tines up, the fork handle should lie on the middle finger, and the index and thumb should hold the fork on their sides. In these cases, food is taken on a fork, helping with the tip of a knife blade.

The spoon should be held in the right hand. The end of the spoon handle should rest on the index finger, and the beginning on the middle finger. If the dish consists of pieces that can be separated without a knife, then only a fork is served and it must be held in the right hand.

The knife and fork are held in the hands throughout the entire dinner - this classic way. There is also an American style of eating that allows you to use these items interchangeably. That is, after cutting the dish, you can take the fork in your right hand and eat with it. While waiting for a change of dishes, the knife and fork should be placed crosswise on the plate. In this case, the handle of the knife should point to the right, and the tines of the fork should be turned down.

How to use a napkin correctly.

According to modern etiquette rules, a napkin should be placed on your lap so as not to stain your clothes if food accidentally gets on it. Sitting down at the table, you need to unfold the napkin, fold it in half and place it on your lap. If you get your fingers dirty while eating, you can wipe them with the top half of the napkin, leaving it on your lap. To blot your lips, you need to take a napkin from your knees into your palm so that the ends turn over in your palms and the napkin becomes shorter, then apply its middle to your lips. Afterwards, the napkin should be placed to the right of the plate. Under no circumstances should it be hung on the back of a chair or placed on a seat.

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Table etiquette

General table manners

General rules of behavior or table etiquette are the minimum that every cultured person should know.

When sitting at a table, you should only rest your wrist on its edge. Women are allowed to rest their elbow on the table for a short period of time.

You cannot roll bread balls, play with cutlery, play with a glass, roll the edge of the tablecloth into a tube, stretch your legs to the full length under the table, and perform other similar actions.

When eating, you should not spread your elbows and bow your head low over the plate. The head is only slightly tilted and a fork or spoon is brought to this height. Blowing is not welcome hot food and drinks, “slurping”, sipping.

If you drink any drink with food, first swallow what is in your mouth. Beforehand, it is advisable to wipe your lips with a napkin to avoid traces of greasy stains on the glass.

It is unethical to refill the bottle only for yourself. Having taken a bottle or decanter, first offer it to your neighbor at the table.

Cocktails are drunk in small sips, taking breaks.

Drink vodka from a small glass immediately.

Wine, like cocktails, is consumed in small sips from a glass.

Cognac is also drunk in small sips, with breaks.

Champagne can be drunk either all at once or a little at a time.

Compotes are usually poured into compote cups. They are not drunk, but eaten with a spoon along with liquid. If the compote contains cherries, the pits should be carefully spat out into a spoon and then placed on a saucer. Under no circumstances should you drink compote from a cup, then eat fruit, the remains of which should be put back into the cup - this is very bad form.

Under no circumstances should you sit at the table with a cigarette.

Women should wipe their lips painted with lipstick with paper, not linen, napkins.

Sitting at the table, they do not cut bread with a knife, but break off small pieces; You should also not dip bread into the sauce.

Avoid using a knife while eating pasta, vermicelli, noodles, fish, solyanka, omelettes, puddings, jellies and vegetables. In this case, only a fork is used.

If there is no spoon in the salt shaker, salt is scooped up with the tip of your knife, but at the same time clearing it of foreign contaminants.

It is permissible to use a knife to cut pancakes or pancakes, chopped schnitzel, vegetable cutlets, vareniki. Alternatively, you can use just a fork.

Small pieces of bread can be spread with butter from your own plate.

It is allowed to spread a piece of bread with butter and take a bite of the resulting sandwich, rather than cutting it off with a knife. At the same time, take a little oil from the butter dish onto the edge of the plate. Bread spread with butter cannot be cut with a knife.

A sandwich with ham or cheese is eaten from a plate using a knife and fork.

Buffet sandwiches are usually eaten without cutlery. Sometimes such a sandwich turns out to be a whole pyramid, and it, of course, falls apart in your hands and does not fit in your mouth. This sandwich should be placed on a plate and used with a knife and fork. If you don’t find any utensils at hand, use paper napkins.

The sausage casing is separated using a knife and fork on a plate. Dry sausage is eaten with the skin on. Thin-skinned sausages also do not need to be peeled.

It is customary to eat meat and vegetables without letting go of the knife and fork.

The appetizer (for example, if it is ham) is not placed on bread. Ham is eaten with a knife and fork.

For peas, use a fork; at the same time, it is worth remembering that it is not pricked, but drawn onto it, like on a spatula.

Scrambled eggs can be eaten with a spoon or fork, depending on the consistency.

A soft-boiled egg is inserted into a special glass, then the edge of a spoon is struck close to the top and removed. If the top does not bounce off, you can remove it with your fingers. The egg is eaten with a spoon.

Chicken in broth is both the first and second, so first eat the broth with a spoon, and then eat the chicken pieces with a fork and knife.

When eating pate, separate a piece with a fork. You can spread it on bread only in the family circle.

The soup is eaten without tilting the plate. Just no a large number of remains at the bottom. Neither during a meal nor after it is a spoon of soup placed on the table, but left in the plate.

Broths and soups served in cups are drunk without using a spoon. A spoon is used when you want to remove croutons, eggs, or pieces of meat from soup. But if the soup is served in a cup with two ears, then use a spoon.

Fish, both cold and hot, does not allow a knife. There are special devices for fish. Different types fish should be consumed accordingly and differently. For example, smoked and pickled fish are quite hard, so it is better to cut them with a knife. If the fish is fried or stewed, a special device is used to separate the fish pulp from the bones. You can use two forks or a special spatula knife, which should be held in your right hand and the fork in your left. Hold the piece with a fork and separate the bones with a spatula. If two forks are served, the right one is used to separate the bones, while the left one is used to put pieces of fish into the mouth. As a last resort, if you have only one fork at your disposal, take it in your right hand, in your left hand - a piece of bread, which serves to hold a piece of fish, and a fork for separating bones, with its help bring the piece to your mouth. The fish bone is not spat out of the mouth, but placed discreetly on the fork with the tip of the tongue. If there is a whole fish on your plate, it is first separated from the skeleton. top part fillet, eat, then separate the spine and bones, set aside, then eat the second part.

It is perfectly acceptable to eat crayfish, crabs, clams or lobsters with your hands. If the above dishes are prepared in such a way that they require utensils for their consumption, then they will be served to you specially - tongs, a lobster fork or a crayfish knife. For example, if you ordered crab and it was served without a shell, then using a special fork and knife will not be a big deal, otherwise you won’t need any utensils - it will be more convenient to use your hands and will not cause embarrassment to others. In this case, you just have to know how to do it correctly. To clean a crab, you need to hold its head firmly with one hand and bend the end of the tail with the other. This will cause the thin shell of the crab to burst in the middle, after which it can be easily removed and the meat can be eaten without any problems.

It is customary to serve crayfish whole on the table. To separate the tail, you need to tilt it slightly to the side, slightly rotating it. To eat all kinds of shellfish, no special equipment is required. As a last resort, you can use a regular fork to remove the meat from the shells.

Oysters in restaurants are served already opened, and sometimes even separated from the shell, then eating them is not particularly difficult. If oysters are served uncut, then there is a special fork for them. With this fork, the meat is easily separated from the shell.

Most restaurants serve lobster ready to eat; you only need a lobster fork to remove the meat from the claws. You can do without a fork - just suck the meat out of the shell.

As a rule, half a lobster tail is served as an appetizer; ordinary cutlery is suitable for its consumption. Use a fork to remove the meat from half the shell, and then eat it in the usual way, using a knife and fork.

Don’t worry about the cleanliness of your hands; after finishing your meal, the waiter will definitely give you a bowl of water in which you can wash your hands, and the specific smell will destroy the piece of lemon floating in the water.

Artichokes are also one of the dishes that are easier to eat with your hands. The artichoke leaves are torn off with your fingers, then dipped into the sauce prepared for this and sucked out. The only rule of good manners that should not be forgotten in this case is that you need to suck out the pulp, as silently as possible. The hard parts of the artichoke leaves are carefully placed on a waste plate. When you get to the stalk that should be eaten using the device, first wash your hands in a bowl of water specially provided for this purpose, and then use a fork and knife to eat the stalk.

It is not customary to cut green salad with a knife; if the leaves are too large, cut them with a fork or carefully wrap the leaves around it.

The bird is eaten with a knife and fork. It is not necessary to clean all the bones; there should be some meat left on them.

If the potatoes are served whole, they should not be squashed on the plate.

Spaghetti is eaten with a fork and spoon. The spoon is held in the left hand. The edge of the spoon is lowered into the plate, spaghetti is wrapped around the fork in the recess of the spoon. After wrapping a little pasta on a fork, use a spoon to separate this portion from the rest.

Chopped cutlets or meatballs are not cut with a knife, but eaten, separating small pieces with a fork, and in this case it is quite acceptable to hold the fork in the right hand.

An exception, perhaps, could be a dish such as “Kiev cutlets.” The peculiarity of this dish is that there is butter inside the cutlet, and the cutlet itself is covered with a fairly hard crust of breadcrumbs. To prevent oil from splashing in your face or on your clothes, you need to carefully pierce the cutlet crust with a fork and cut off a small piece with a knife in your right hand.

Sweet dough is eaten with special forks. If there are none, then you can use a spoon.

Dry cakes, gingerbreads, gingerbread can be taken with your hands.

Dryers and crackers can be dipped in tea or milk only when you are in a family circle.

If you are offered apples or pears at any reception, you should know that it is customary to eat them using a knife and fork. First, the fruit is divided into four parts, then each quarter is put on a fork and, in turn, peeled with a knife, which must be very sharp. Each peeled piece is eaten from the plate using a knife and fork.

It is acceptable to peel the fruit in your hand, but you should eat it on a plate with a knife and fork.

The peach is cut on a plate, the pit is removed, then the skin is removed using a knife and fork, and eaten with their help, cutting off a piece at a time.

Bananas are peeled and eaten with a knife and fork, cutting into slices.

The peel of the orange is cut crosswise, removed and divided into slices.

Oranges and tangerines are not peeled in a spiral manner.

Grapes are usually eaten whole.

The plums are broken with your fingers and the pits are placed on a plate.

Melon is eaten only with a spoon, a knife is not used.

A piece of watermelon should be placed on a plate, cut off a piece with a knife and, freeing it from seeds, put it into your mouth on a fork.

After eating, the knife and fork are placed parallel to each other in the plate, with the handles facing to the right. When it is expected that the same devices will be used during the reception next dish, then they are placed on the table.

Eating is not just satisfying hunger, it is an action in which everything is planned, everything flows according to its own aesthetic laws. To violate them is to spoil the appetite of those around you and show yourself in the most unfavorable light.

At first glance it may seem strange, but the ability to properly hold a spoon and fork, eat aesthetically and beautifully can bring considerable benefits in social life and when solving business issues. Conversely, poor table manners can negatively impact a person's business career.

Family dinners

Breakfasts, lunches and dinners are held, whenever possible, at strictly set times. If you can’t have breakfast or lunch with the whole family because your parents are working, then by dinner you need to make an effort to ensure that all family members gather at the table.

The same can be said about Sundays. For children, shared dinners, if they are beautifully furnished, are always a holiday. In turn, parents have the opportunity not only to communicate with their children, but also to unobtrusively teach them another lesson in table manners, teaching them the rules of decency and good manners by their own example.

How to behave morning tea or coffee

Children should sit at the table cleanly and neatly dressed, washed and carefully combed. Naturally, this can only be achieved if the parents themselves strictly observe these rules. Achieving this is not so difficult; children are already appearance those around you will feel the solemnity of the atmosphere. An ordinary breakfast will turn into a small holiday for them.

During breakfast, parents should immediately stop squabbling between children, teasing, or other manifestations of noise.

It is better to give bread to small children so that there are no disputes between them. Doing this is important for several reasons. Firstly, a quarrel at the table spoils the whole atmosphere of breakfast. Secondly, it grossly contradicts the norms of education and etiquette. Thirdly, an argument that begins in the morning very often continues in one form or another between children after breakfast, determining the nature of the entire day. You can name other reasons, but one of the three already listed is quite enough.

It is considered bad manners to blow on tea to make it cool, as well as to drink it from a saucer. Therefore, tea, coffee or milk should be served at such a temperature that it does not require refrigeration.

When stirring sugar in a glass or cup with a spoon, do it silently, do not rattle the spoon on the glass.

It is not permissible to soak crackers in a glass of boiling water or throw pieces of bread into it.

The required portion of butter is placed on a separate plate in front of each person and from there spread on the bread.

Drink tea or coffee without making any noise around you that is unpleasant to your hearing.

Don't talk loudly at the table.

Chew your food with your mouth closed.

Don't talk with your mouth full.

Sit straight at the table, do not lean on the back of the chair.

The lack of known etiquette skills acquired in childhood later instills young man or a girl lacking self-confidence, fear of doing something wrong at a table. As a result, the naturalness of behavior is lost, and the visitor (or owner) himself loses a lot in the eyes of others.

Even at the table, where standards of behavior are significantly reduced and high rules of etiquette are not observed, a person who indiscriminately grabs the best pieces from all the plates and greedily chews food makes an unpleasant impression on others, causing ironic glances or ridicule from neighbors at the table.

It will be difficult for such a person to achieve great success at work. Inability to behave most often manifests itself in small things. They usually turn a blind eye to one small mistake, but pay attention to several; many small mistakes indicate bad upbringing, inability to behave in society with all the ensuing consequences.

How to behave at the dinner table

A person who is little familiar with the norms of etiquette and who finds himself in decent society for the first time will have to endure many unpleasant moments and condescending smiles throughout the entire dinner.

Really, how to behave? What to do with a napkin? How to take this or that food from the dish? How to use a knife and fork and what to do if there is not one fork, but several? In order not to lose face, he carefully looks at the actions of his neighbors and repeats them.

At the same time, he has to answer numerous questions, engage his neighbors in conversation, or look after them by putting this or that dish on their plate. It is no easier for a girl, although she may try to hide the flaws of her upbringing behind a mask of natural shyness.

Nevertheless, both the boy and the girl cannot be envied at these moments. It seems to them that all the eyes of those around them are directed towards them, and this is often the case. This makes your hands stiff and a stone falls on your heart.

The main thing, perhaps, in such cases is not to get confused, not to lose confidence and remain yourself. A person who has lost confidence makes one mistake after another, answers questions inappropriately, blushes, withdraws into himself, and looks gloomy. And in the end, we can consider that an important exam in life has been completely failed.

The hosts will think ten times before inviting such a guest to dinner again. And the young man himself is unlikely to dare to repeat the horror he experienced. After such a failure, many, as they say, lose their face.

Therefore, it is important to remain yourself at the table, not to be ashamed of your mistakes, but also try not to show them. And at the same time, try to show in all their splendor those qualities thanks to which you found yourself in an unfamiliar environment - among people who are more significant and more educated. This captivating behavior of yours will smooth out all the rough edges, your flaws will soon be forgotten.

And one more piece of advice: read a book about etiquette (at least this one) before an important visit; Of course, you won’t remember everything right away, but you will have much less reason to blush at the table.

How to use a knife and fork correctly

The fork is held in the left hand, the knife in the right.

The knife and fork are held in your hands the entire time you are eating a dish that requires their simultaneous use. Placing them one by one on the table is unacceptable.

When cutting meat or other food, hold the fork in an inclined position, at an angle. If it is positioned perpendicularly, the fork can slide across the plate, producing an extremely unpleasant grinding noise. But this is not the worst thing. It’s much worse when the contents of the plate scatter in all directions. The tablecloth, your own clothes and the clothes of your neighbors get dirty. What a nuisance! If this happens, we can only advise one thing: after apologizing to the victims and the hostess, try to endure the small embarrassment calmly, with imperturbable calm. This way you will avoid ridicule and ironic remarks.

The knife is used at the table only for internal use. Taking salt from a salt shaker with a knife or cutting bread is unacceptable. By the way, salt is taken only with a special spoon, and the bread at the table is not cut, but broken. They cut it earlier and serve it already sliced.

They cut with a knife - they don’t eat from it. This is not only unsightly, but also dangerous. Not only can you injure your tongue or lips, but any careless movement by your neighbor can cause much more misfortune.

Served with fruit special knives- not steel. Steel degrades the taste of the fruit.

How to use a spoon

It is customary to hold a spoon with the first three fingers, with the thumb at the top.

Do not put a lot of soup on the spoon - it will flow over the edge. Spray yourself and the tablecloth.

The spoon also serves to cool the soup. They don’t blow on it, but stir it with a spoon.

If there is a need to tilt the plate to eat the leftover soup, then do it away from you. Accordingly, the nature of the movement of the spoon changes. If you tilt the plate towards you, relearn it. Otherwise, at a party, when everything has to be done in accordance with etiquette, your movements will lose their naturalness and ease.

In order to eat the first course without making unaesthetic sounds, you need to bring the end of the spoon to your mouth, and not its side.

The correct use of a knife, fork and spoon is not a trifle, but an important part of etiquette. You can understand this only when you yourself learn to use cutlery correctly and easily and when you then see the inept, constrained actions of your neighbor at the table.

The fact is that the lack of skills to properly use these items is immediately apparent, instantly characterizing the degree of a person’s upbringing.

Is it right to put best piece to kid

The mother’s desire to give a better piece to her child is quite understandable and understandable. But this should be done in such a way that he does not have thoughts of his exclusivity. You should completely stop any attempt to demand something; you can only ask politely.

It is very important from childhood to teach children to be content with what they are given, and not to choose what is better and tastier on the table. The thought should become a law for him: the mother gives what is needed, and it simply cannot be otherwise.

What conversations are appropriate at the family table?

Only adults participate in the conversation at the family table. The younger ones sit quietly and listen silently.

The topic of conversation depends on the mood, education, and interests of those talking. It is just important not to forget that the conversation is being conducted in the presence of children, who do not need to hear everything. Although this side does not cause any particular concern.

The topic of conversations between husband and wife, as a rule, is limited to family matters, discussion of current problems, upcoming purchases and expenses, and various types of incidents. It is even useful for children to listen to such conversations.

Aperitif

Aperitif (French aperitif) - weak alcoholic drink, which is consumed before meals to quench thirst and stimulate appetite. Olives, lemon slices, almonds and other nuts are often served as appetizers for aperitifs. Soft drinks, juices and wine and vodka products. From soft drinks- mineral waters, as well as carbonated, soda and plain chilled water. The best juices for aperitif are: lemon, orange, grapefruit, pomegranate, tomato, birch, grape (from unsweetened grape varieties). The most common drink used as an aperitif is vermouth.

Aperitifs are divided into three groups: single, combined and mixed.

Single called an aperitif consisting of only one drink (for example, only one vermouth or one type of juice or mineral water is served).

Combined aperitif consists of several drinks served simultaneously (e.g. mineral water, juices and wine).

Mixed aperitifs consist of specially prepared mixtures of various drinks (for example, cocktails).

Before the start of the banquet, during the gathering of guests, it is customary to offer them an aperitif. Aperitifs are served on small trays covered with napkins.

At receptions, aperitifs are served by waiters. If you are talking to a lady, ask her what she would like to drink and serve her the appropriate drink, only then choose an aperitif for yourself. Also offer a snack (lemons, almonds) on the tray. The empty glass should be placed on a specially designated table or on a table with cigarettes.

Often, receptions end with the serving of cocktails and aperitifs, and then guests are offered coffee.

Banquet

Banquet (French banquet) is a formal dinner party or dinner held in honor of someone or something. Depending on the form of service, the following types of banquets are distinguished: a banquet at a table with full service, a banquet at a table with partial service, a buffet banquet, a combined banquet, a cocktail banquet, a tea banquet.

Full service table banquet

This type of banquet is a celebration where participants sit at a beautifully decorated table, and waiters serve food and drinks. No snacks, dishes or drinks are placed on the table.

The banquet is held on the occasion of official visits of officials, foreign representatives and delegations, during international meetings and symposiums, conferences, exhibitions, etc.

Setting the table for a full service banquet begins with arranging the tables and covering them with tablecloths.

It should be remembered that a snow-white, well-ironed and properly laid tablecloth gives the table a special solemnity.

If banquet tables are made up of polished restaurant dining tables for 4-6 people, then they are first covered with cloth, which absorbs noise, absorbs moisture and gives stability to serving items. Then the table is served with small dinner plates at a distance of 0.8–1.0 m from each other. The plates are placed starting from the center of the table, first on one side, then on the other, and make sure that the plates stand strictly opposite one another. Snack bars are placed on small table plates, and pie plates are placed on the left at a distance of 10–15 cm.

Then the cutlery is laid out at a distance of 0.5 cm to the right of the small plate: a table knife, a fish knife to the right of it 0.5 cm, then, if there is soup on the menu, a tablespoon or dessert spoon and a snack knife. A table fork is placed on the left side of a small dinner plate, then a fish fork and a snack fork are placed to the left. Next, lay out dessert (or fruit) knives, forks and spoons. Shot glasses, glasses, and wine glasses are placed in a certain order. Beautifully folded napkins are placed on appetizer plates. Dishes with spices are installed in pairs, one device for two guests. Moreover, the cutlery is placed at the level of glass (crystal) dishes, between the serving items of the guests sitting next to them. Banquet tables are decorated with flowers and national flags of the countries whose participants are at the table. Small cards indicating the last name, first name, and patronymic of the banquet participant are placed either next to the wine glass (to the left of it) or behind a small dinner plate and fruit cutlery.

Beautifully designed banquet menu forms are placed behind the pie plate. The menu contains a list of all snacks, dishes, drinks, and also informs the reason for the event. For foreign guests, there should be a translation of the names of dishes and drinks into their native language.

At an official banquet, ashtrays are placed on the tables only when coffee is served.

Banquet at table with partial service

A banquet at a table with partial service is the most common type of banquet for friendly meetings, family celebrations, anniversaries and weddings. The placement of guests at the table is, as a rule, arbitrary, but for the guests of honor and the banquet organizer, seats are provided in the center of the table. The banquet table is served strictly according to the menu with dinner plates, cutlery, glass and crystal, and napkins. In addition, cold dishes and snacks, drinks and vases of fruit, cutlery with spices are placed on the table 30–40 minutes before guests arrive, and the table is decorated with flowers.

A banquet at a table with partial service lasts 1.5–2 hours (except for New Year's and weddings, which last much longer).

The banquet menu usually includes a large assortment of cold dishes, snacks and various drinks. If a banquet at a table with partial service is held at lunchtime, then the first course is added to the menu - soup.

Typically, for every 3–3.5 m of table length, which corresponds to 4–5 people sitting at the table on each side, all cold dishes, snacks and drinks indicated on the menu are placed. If the table is longer and the number of participants is greater, then for the next 3–3.5 m of the table the number of dishes, snacks and drinks is repeated, etc.

Dishes and snacks in dishes with legs or with high sides (vases, salad bowls) are placed closer to the center of the table, and with low sides (dishes, trays) - closer to the serving items, while alternating snacks from fish, meat and poultry.

Dishes with dishes and snacks are placed in one or two rows depending on the width of the table, the number of snacks and the size of the dishes. Butter is placed next to the caviar, sauces are placed next to the dishes that they accompany. Vases with fruits and flowers are placed along the axis of the table, and the distance between them (in the center) is used to arrange drinks. Bottles of drinks are placed with the label facing the guests sitting at the table. Some bottles (especially those with corks) may be uncorked in advance. Bottles closed with crown caps (water, beer, juices, kvass, etc.) are uncorked 5 minutes before inviting guests to the table. Like appetizers, drinks are placed along the entire length of the table so that each guest can take out any of them of his choice and pour himself into a glass.

After drinks, bread is placed on each guest's pie plate (wheat and rye). Then, after a thorough check (preferably in the presence of the customer) of the readiness of the banquet table and service personnel, all banquet participants are invited to the banquet hall.

Banquet buffet

The name “banquet buffet” comes from the French “a la buffet,” which means “on the fork.” The main cutlery when eating is a fork.

A buffet banquet is usually organized in cases where it is necessary to receive a large number of guests in a relatively limited time (1–1.5 hours) (this could be an official reception, anniversary, family celebration or other festive event). Guests are given free choice of seat in the hall. Guests themselves choose the dishes and drinks placed on the table, eat and drink while standing at or near the buffet table. They can leave the banquet at any time without waiting for it to end.

Tables for a banquet are installed in the hall in the form of a rectangle or in the form of the letters “P”, “T” and “W”, but so that the distance between the tables and from the tables to the walls of the hall is sufficient (1.5 m) for the free movement of guests . Along the walls or in the corners of the room there are small round or square tables covered with tablecloths, on which cigarettes, ashtrays, matches and flowers in tall vases, and paper napkins are placed.

The buffet banquet menu consists mainly of appetizers, the range of which is much wider than the menu of other banquets. Sometimes the menu of a buffet banquet includes second hot dishes (for example, a saddle of lamb, a pig or whole roasted turkey, etc.), which are served as a hot appetizer. The meat is first cut into small slices, then reshaped into a carcass. This dish is eaten using a snack plate and snack utensils. All snacks are prepared (cut) in small portions so that they can be conveniently eaten standing with one fork.

Buffet table setting

Buffet tables are covered with banquet tablecloths so that their ends hang equally on all sides of the table, at a distance of 5-10 cm from the floor. The corners of each tablecloth are folded from the end sides inwards, the ends are fastened to the sides, forming a right angle.

There are two options for serving a buffet table: one-sided and two-sided. In the first option, the table is served on one side only, usually used for honored guests and the banquet organizer. The table is installed perpendicular to the main table at a distance of 1.0–1.5 m or one side to the wall. Double-sided serving is carried out on both sides of the table. The buffet table covered with a tablecloth is first served with glass (crystal): wine glasses, shot glasses, Lafite, Rhine wine and vodka glasses. As a rule, part of the glass (crystal) is kept on utility tables and displayed as needed.

Double-sided buffet table setting is the most appropriate. The glass (crystal) is arranged in one of the following ways: in two rows, in groups, in a herringbone pattern, in a snake pattern.

Serving glass in two rows start by arranging the glasses. At the ends of the table, in its center at a distance of 15–20 cm from the end, wine glasses of 9-11-17-21 pieces are placed in a triangle. If the table length is over 7 m, wine glasses can also be placed in the middle in two symmetrical triangles of 7–9 pieces. The space between them (25–30 cm) is used to place bottles of mineral and fruit waters.

The glasses are placed lengthwise in the center of the table in two rows, the distance between which is 20–25 cm, and between the glasses - 1.5–2 cm. The glasses are arranged in a certain order: first, small size and containers (vodka), medium size and containers (lafite) and larger sizes (rainwine). The alternation of glasses in both rows should be the same. Therefore, first they place one row of glasses, and align the second one along it.

Jugs with juices are placed at the ends of the table in front of the wine glasses, so glasses for juices are placed in groups near the jugs.

Table setting with glass (crystal) in groups they begin by placing a group of wine glasses along the edges of the table, then at an angle of 30–45 degrees to the axis of the table, groups of glasses (vodka, Rhine wine, Lafite) are placed parallel to each other at a distance of 50–60 cm between the groups. If the length of the table is more than 7 m, then an additional group of wine glasses is installed in the center of the table.

At serving with a snake Wine glasses and glasses are placed along the entire table, while observing the general principle - taller wine glasses are placed in the center of the table, lower ones - closer to the edge.

At crystal herringbone table setting along the longitudinal axis of the table at a distance of 60–80 cm in the center, place wine glasses of 4–6 pieces, then at an angle of 45 degrees on both sides to the edge of the table, place 3 pieces of Rhine wine, Lafite and vodka glasses in triangles.

If the length of the table is more than 7 m, then to its middle the direction of the glasses at an angle of 45 degrees is made on one side of the table, and on the other half in the opposite direction.

To set the buffet table, you need appetizer and dessert plates. The number of plates for a banquet is determined on the basis of: appetizers - 1–2 pieces, dessert plates - 1 plate for each guest.

Snack plates are placed on both sides along the table in stacks of 6-10 pieces at a distance of 2 cm from the edge of the table. The distance from the ends of the table and between the stacks of plates is 1.5–2 m. Dessert plates in stacks of 3–4 pieces are placed a little to the right in front of the snack bars, closer to the glasses. When arranging snack and dessert plates, you should remember that the emblems (monograms, brands) on the plate should be strictly on the side opposite to the guest.

Then the buffet table is served with cutlery: snack knives and forks, fruit cutlery. To serve a banquet, the number of utensils is determined per person: snack forks - 1.5–2 pcs.; snack knives - 0.5–1 pcs.; dessert knives (fruit) - 0.3–0.5 pcs. There are two options for serving a buffet table with snack cutlery:

1st option: forks, according to the number of snack plates (6–8 pcs.), are placed on the edge (edge ​​to the plate) to the left of each stack of plates, and snack knives (3–4 pcs.) are placed to the right of the plates.

2nd option: Diner forks are placed on the edge to the right of the snack knives, with the tip facing the plate. The most common option in restaurants is the first option of serving a buffet banquet. The number of fruit knives and forks is equal to the number of dessert plates (3–4 pieces). The distance between the edge of the plates and the first knife and fork should be 1.5–2 cm.

Pepper shakers and salt shakers (preferably open type) are placed directly on the table behind the plates of bread. Spice spoons are placed in each pepper shaker and salt shaker with the handle facing to the right. Linen napkins, folded in quarters and then in half, are placed behind each stack of appetizer plates.

Banquet-cocktail

Banquet-cocktails are organized when serving participants of international symposiums, conferences, congresses, meetings and other meetings. At a cocktail banquet you can host a large number of guests in a relatively small room. A distinction is made between a business cocktail banquet lasting 40–50 minutes, which is organized during intervals (breaks) at meetings, congresses, symposiums, and a cocktail banquet for relaxation lasting up to 1.5–2 hours, usually held at the end of meetings, sometimes in the open air.

Characteristic features of a cocktail banquet: all guests drink and eat standing; banquet tables are not placed, small tables are placed in the hall near the walls or in the corners, on which cigarettes, matches are placed, vases with paper napkins and flowers are placed; plates and cutlery are not served to each guest; guests use skewers instead of forks; Waiters offer snacks and drinks to guests on trays; Trays for collecting used dishes are placed on several utility tables.

A bar counter is installed in the banquet hall.

The banquet-cocktail menu consists of small-portioned appetizers: cold appetizers - sandwiches (canapés) with granular sturgeon and salmon caviar, salmon (chum salmon, balyk), sturgeon, ham, sausage, cheese, tartlets with pate, salad; hot appetizers - sausages, lula kebab, cutlets, pieces of fish in dough, pieces of shish kebab; dessert - ice cream, jelly, cream, fruit, nuts, etc.

Hot drinks include coffee and tea, cold drinks include juices, water (mineral and fruit), and cocktails.

At the cocktail banquet the following sequence is expected:

Aperitif, then cold appetizers;

Hot appetizers;

Hot drinks (coffee, tea).

Banquet-tea

Banquet-tea is held in the afternoon, usually at 16-18 hours. The banquet lasts no more than two hours.

In the center banquet hall put a round, oval or rectangular table and chairs (armchairs). Along the walls there are sofas, armchairs, and between them 1–2 small tables covered with colored tablecloths for flowers, cigarettes, ashtrays and matches.

The banquet-tea menu consists of flour confectionery products (cakes, pastries, sweet pies, cookies), chocolates, chocolate, jam, honey, sugar, fruit, milk or cream, etc. The banquet menu sometimes includes 1–2 sweet dishes - jelly, mousse, cream, ice cream, etc.

A tea banquet looks much more solemn when tea is poured from a samovar. The samovar on a tray is placed on the edge of the tea table or separately on a side table covered with a tablecloth. To the left of the samovar there is a second tray, covered with a napkin, with tea cups, saucers and teaspoons. Teapots are placed on the tray in front of the samovar, slightly to the right.

On a tea table covered with a colored tablecloth, a dessert plate is placed opposite each guest’s seat, dessert knives and forks are laid out to the right and left of it, and if there is fruit on the menu, a fruit utensil (behind the dessert plate), then dessert knives and forks are laid out to the right and left of the plate. forks.

In particular special occasions Champagne glasses are placed in front of the dessert plates. The tea table is not served with wine glasses, since it is not customary to serve either mineral or fruit water at a banquet. After this, linen napkins are laid out on dessert plates. Then sweet dishes and various flour confectionery products are placed on the table (30–40 minutes before the start of the banquet). Sweet pie or the cake is cut into portions in advance. All sweet dishes, except for wrapped sweets and fruits, are served with special utensils for laying out (spatulas, forks, tongs, etc.). Rosettes are placed in stacks of 5-6 pieces near each vase with jam, honey or jam.

A certain sequence of serving dishes and products is followed: first they offer sweet dishes, then they serve tea with flour confectionery and lastly - fruits, nuts, and sweets.

The cup of tea should be brought to the guest with the right hand on the right and placed in front of him, to the right of the dessert knife, with the handle to the left of the guest.

When serving a sweet dish, instead of a dessert plate and cutlery, a pie plate, covered with a carved paper napkin, with a dessert spoon (the handle is turned to the right of the guest) is first placed in front of each guest. Place a bowl with a sweet dish on a plate. The waiter then removes the used dishes, replacing them with a dessert plate and cutlery. Sweet dishes (except ice cream) can be placed on the table before guests arrive (10–15 minutes).

You can include coffee in the tea banquet menu. In this case, they also place on the tray with tea cups coffee cups with saucers and coffee spoons, and next to teapots- a coffee pot with hot coffee.

Combined banquet

A combination banquet usually consists of two or three banquets - for example, a buffet banquet and a full-service table banquet. To hold such a banquet, two adjacent halls are required. First, guests are invited to the first room with a covered buffet table(s), which offers cold appetizers and drinks. Then after 30-40 minutes they are invited to another room, prepared for a banquet at the table with full service. After guests take their places at the table, they are offered lunch or dinner (depending on the time of day). Service begins with serving hot appetizers. Then soup is served (if it is lunch), a second hot course, dessert and coffee (or tea).

Hot appetizers can be served at the buffet table, then table service begins with the serving of hot dishes.

A combination banquet can be organized from a cocktail banquet and a banquet at the table with full service.

Often a banquet is organized at a table with full or partial service, in which coffee (and sometimes dessert) is served in another room. Coffee is served with chocolate, pastries (cakes, pastries), related drinks and tobacco products.

Dishes

Hot dishes such as omelettes, pancakes, casseroles, etc. are eaten dessert fork holding it in his right hand. Fruit dumplings - with a knife and fork, porridge - with a dessert spoon. Cakes, pastries and other pastries are eaten with a cake fork held in the right hand. For puddings, creams and jellies, coffee spoons are served. Pies and buns filled with cream or jam are eaten holding them in the hand.

In some countries (for example, in France, famous for its cuisine), cheese and fruit are usually served for dessert instead of sweets. Durum varieties The cheese is cut with a knife and eaten with a dessert fork. Soft cheeses (eg. processed cheese) spread with a knife on bread and butter. Cheese served with syrup, fruit or yogurt is eaten with a coffee spoon.

It is customary to eat fruits with a utensil; fruits with small seeds are eaten with hands. The seeds or grains are not spit out directly onto the plate, but are placed on it with a fork or spoon.

Apples and pears are cut into four parts with a knife, peeled and cored. Then they are eaten by hand or with a utensil. Peaches and apricots are also eaten; you should not bite into the whole fruit.

Bananas can be eaten with a knife and fork, but are usually eaten by holding them in the hand and peeling them.

Garden and forest berries are eaten with a spoon.

The orange is taken in the left hand and the peel is cut along it to the pulp. It is then peeled and divided into slices, which are eaten with your hands.

Currants and grapes are picked from the bunch with your fingers. All fresh fruit must be thoroughly washed before serving.

After lunch it is advisable to offer and serve a good one, strong coffee. It should be remembered that the coffee is only stirred with a spoon, after which it is immediately placed on the saucer. The spoon is not left in the cup. Lump sugar is taken from the sugar bowl with special tweezers.

Wine

In the old days, no true gentleman could ignore such important characteristics as the place where the grapes from which the wine was made grew, the temperature of the wines and the order in which they were served. He definitely had his own wine Vault and strictly monitored each bottle, trying to ensure ideal conditions storage He knew enough to prevent his butler from dusting a bottle of old Château Mouton Rothschild, or to forbid him from wrapping it in a napkin, thereby concealing the bottle's pedigree from interested guests. This was especially true for red wines. For such a gentleman, aged wines were stored horizontally at the appropriate temperature and were never removed from their cells until the very moment of serving.

The wine could be poured into beautiful clear glass decanters (only very carefully; first loosen the cork, but in no case pull it out with a sharp movement), trying not to disturb the sediment collected at the bottom. It was possible to pour wine directly from the bottle by placing it in a special wine basket, due to which the bottle was located almost horizontally and the sediment did not rise. The easiest way to deal with sediment from red wine is to place the bottles on the dining table a few hours before dinner so that all the sediment sinks to the bottom. Red table wines need to “breathe” a little before drinking. Therefore, they must be opened an hour before lunch.

What types of wines are there?

Table wines. These are the wines that are served various dishes at lunch time. Red wines vary in wide range from blood-red, thick Burgundy (infinitely varied), thinner ruby-red, sourish-tart Bordeaux to pink, as if filled with a light paint of shame, surprisingly light compared to all the others. Red wines are served at room temperature or slightly warmed. Rose wines are always cooling, which is why they are especially pleasant in hot weather. Of all the countless varieties of red wines, although they mostly bear French names, naturally, not all are truly Burgundian. They are called that only because of their color.

Dry red wines. It's the fault of low content sugar (red Chianti, berbere, etc.). They are best served with main courses, although recently sweet red wines and even some of the sweet Sauternes have become increasingly popular as table wines. For people who understand the true meaning of food and wine will tell you that sweet wine, served before or during dinner, interrupts the appetite, while dry wine is intended precisely to stimulate the appetite and highlight the taste of food.

Dry white wines. It is considered perfectly acceptable to serve one type of dry white wine throughout the entire meal, even with meat. But if you follow the rules, then during a formal dinner it is customary to serve sherry with soup, dry white wine (for example, Rhein wine or Chablis) with fish, chicken, brains, sweet bread, seafood delicacies, and dry red or sparkling Burgundy with meat , duck, goose or game.

A breakfast with one type of wine goes well if you serve Alsatian, Moselle or white Chianti, Riesling, Traminer, and white table wines.

Sweet red wines. Sweet red wines are served between courses and with dessert. These include, first of all, port (which goes well with nuts and cheese), sweet sherry (which is so often underrated), nutmeg and Madeira.

Sweet white wines. Sweet white wines include Malaga, semi-dry champagne, white Portuguese port from Operto (little known but very refined), Tokay and an American dessert wine from California.

And, of course, there are a great many excellent home-made wines that the hosts will certainly want to introduce to their guests, who will, of course, enjoy demonstrating their culinary skills.

Wine selection. Wines can be excellent, but they can also be terrible. The same can be said about imported wines, even those imported from countries with ancient winemaking traditions. Apparently, you should arrange some kind of tasting to decide which wines suit you best, based on your needs, taste and financial capabilities.

author Podgayskaya A. L.

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From the book Encyclopedia of Etiquette by Emily Post. Rules of good manners and refined manners for all occasions. [Etiquette] by Peggy's Post

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From the book Protocol and Etiquette of Diplomatic and Business Communication author Kuzmin Eduard Leonidovich

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From the book Encyclopedia of Etiquette. All about the rules of good manners author Miller Llewellyn

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From the book A Real Lady. Rules of good manners and style author Vos Elena

AT THE TABLE Knowing the rules of behavior at the table is especially important. This section of etiquette is one of the most difficult, since individual rules differ not only on different continents, but even in countries of the same continent. Therefore, at appropriate receptions it is necessary

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From the author's book

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From the author's book

Table manners? If you are called to the table, do not be late, do not keep yourself waiting.? Don't start eating until everyone is at the table.? Don't move too close to the table, but don't sit too far from it either. Don't lean back in your chair, don't lounge on it.?

Today we’ll talk about the rules of table setting, existing standards behavior during meals and the peculiarities of using various serving items. After all, you must admit that when you master this science, you feel much more confident in any company, on any trip, in any restaurant. I would like to clarify that there are many styles, schools and rules, some even contradict each other. There is a factor of country, institution and traditions here. So I took one of the styles. So let's get started.

Start of lunch.

If you are a guest and there are no name cards on the table, remain standing until the host of the dinner shows you your place at the table.

Napkins.

As soon as you sit down at the table, place the napkin on your lap. It is customary to unfold the napkin in one smooth movement, shaking it in order to straighten it. How you place the napkin on your lap depends on the size of the napkin. There are two options: 1. Large napkins are usually served at more formal events, and in such cases it is customary to unfold the napkin halfway. 2. Smaller napkins are unrolled completely so that they completely cover the knees. Do not tuck the napkin into your collar, between shirt buttons, or into your belt. If you are serving a dish that is traditionally eaten with your hands, look at the host of the dinner and do as he does (perhaps he will tuck a napkin under his chin or tie it around his neck). Using a napkin. During lunch, use a napkin often to blot your lips, but do not wipe them. If there are paper napkins on the table, it is permissible to wipe your lips with them. Before drinking, be sure to blot your lips, this is especially important for women who wear lipstick. Napkin rings. If the table is set with napkins in rings, after you have removed the napkin from the ring, place it in the upper left corner of the cutlery. After finishing dinner, take the napkin by the center, thread it through the ring and place it on the table so that the center of the napkin faces the center of the table. If you need to leave the table for a short time, place the napkin to the left of the plate. At the same time, try to fold the napkin so that the side you used is on the inside. What to do with the napkin after finishing the meal? When the meal is finished:

• Fold the napkin in any convenient way.
• If there is still a plate on the table in front of you, when leaving the table, place the napkin to the left of the plate.
• If the table in front of you is empty, the napkin should be placed in the center of the table, where your plate stood.
• Place the napkin folded so that the dirty parts are not visible.
• If afternoon coffee is served at the dining table, leave the napkin on your lap.

General rules

You need to sit straight at the table, at a comfortable distance from the table, so that your arms, bent at the elbows, are at the same level as the knives and forks. Never put your elbows on the table! If you don't know where to put your hands, just fold them on your knees. If you have already been served a dish, wait until all the guests at the table have been served, and only then pick up the cutlery and start eating. The exception is if the host of the feast invited you to start the meal. Then you can start eating without waiting for the other guests. How close should the dishes be to you so that you can reach them yourself? Everything is simple here: it is permissible to reach only those objects that are in close proximity to you, so that you can reach them with an outstretched arm, slightly leaning to the side. Don't lean over your neighbor to get the dish. To get something that is out of your reach, simply ask “Please pass...”, and also don’t forget to thank anyone who gives you the required item. According to the rules of etiquette, before starting a meal, each of those present must make sure that the other guests have been offered everything they might need - oil, water, salt and pepper, etc. Let's dwell on how pass food correctly at the table.

• According to the rules, food is passed from left to right, and the dish must move in only one direction.
• There are two options: either one of the diners holds the dish while his neighbor fills his plate with it, or the diner passes the dish to his neighbor, and he himself holds the dish and fills his plate.
• It is customary to place dishes that are heavy or inconvenient to hold on weight on the table each time they are passed on to a neighbor.
• Tureens and other utensils with handles are usually handed over in such a way that the handle faces the direction of the guest receiving the dish.

If food is served on a platter and requires cutting, when passing such a dish around the table, the rule applies: each of the diners holds the dish while his neighbor on the right helps himself to food from it, using common utensils that come with the dish. A little clarification is needed here. All cutlery is divided into individual (main) and general (auxiliary). Individual utensils are intended for receiving dishes, and common ones are for laying them out. Using common devices:

• Common cutlery is placed to the right of the dish for which it is intended.
• If both a fork and a spoon are served with a dish, there is a rule: the spoon is placed to the right of the dish so that it is convenient to scoop and lift the food, and the fork is placed on the left so that it can be used to support the food.
• Shared utensils must be returned to the shared dish in the same manner they were served.
• If the spoon for serving the dish was served on a separate plate-stand, after use it must be placed in a common dish (thus preparing it for use by the next guest).
• It is customary to point the blade of a cutting knife towards the inside of the dish to avoid cuts.

Eat at a relaxed pace, firstly, this promotes better digestion, and secondly, this will show the host of the feast that you want to enjoy both the food and the company. Quickly devouring food is a sign of disrespect for the hosts, indicating that you only came to eat and are not interested in the company of those gathered. While eating, keep your mouth closed and try not to make any sounds - be it the knocking of utensils on a plate or teeth, slurping or slurping soup. If the soup is too hot, don't blow on it - just wait until it cools down a bit. If you have food in your mouth, you should try to avoid conversation at all costs, even if you have a suitable remark ready! First, chew and swallow the food, and only then engage in dialogue. If you need to go to the toilet, simply say “Excuse me, I’ll be gone for a minute.” If you need to leave the table due to an urgent matter (call, message, etc.), be sure to apologize to those present, show them that you would be more than happy to remain in their company, but matters are urgent and you are forced to leave from the table. After all, you don’t want your guests to get the impression that you are tired of their company!

Devices

How is it customary to put down your utensils if you are still driving? Cross your knife and fork on your plate. If the size of the plate allows, it is better to fold the cutlery so that the tines of the fork lie on the blade of the knife. In this case, the handle of the knife should point to the right, and the handle of the fork to the left. This is a sign that you are not finished with your dish, so your plate will not be changed. Please note that it is not customary to place cutlery in such a way that half is on the plate and half is on the table. However, this rule does not apply with chopsticks.

Exists two established way to use the devices- classic European(continental) and American. The first implies that the knife and fork are held in the hands throughout the entire meal. It is not customary to put a knife on a plate, even if it is temporarily not needed. The American style of using cutlery allows for the possibility of putting the knife on the edge of the plate if it is temporarily not needed, then you can take the fork in your right hand and eat only with it. In this case, the knife must be placed with the blade inside the plate, with the handle on its edge. Dishes that do not need to be cut - scrambled eggs, omelettes, pasta, vegetables, mashed potatoes, etc. - can be eaten with a fork in the right hand. In this case, the fork can even be turned with the tines up and the convex part down, like a spoon, to make it easier to scoop up food. In this case, you can help yourself with a piece of bread held in your other hand. Food is always cut towards you and so that there are not too many pieces, and each of them can be easily put into the mouth. It is not customary to cut all food into pieces at once. small pieces- Do this gradually as needed. How to finish a meal. Every time you change dishes, when you have finished eating, the knife and fork (convex side down) are placed on the plate parallel to each other, the blade of the knife facing inward. The instrument handles are directed to the lower right corner. This is a sign to the waiter that you have finished eating.

A few words about how to finish eating liquid food that is eaten with a spoon. There are two options here - soup bowls and soup plates. If soup or dessert is served in a deep bowl or cup that stands on a special plate-stand, the device/cutlery should be placed on this stand after eating. If it is too small to hold the utensils, leave them in the bowl. If the soup is served in a soup bowl (a fairly wide and relatively deep bowl), leave the spoon in the bowl after eating.

Always praise the cook!

Even if the food was terrible, find and say something positive. There is no need to lie, for example, if the meat is burnt, you can say: “Well, the sauce was really excellent.” It's nice when dinner ends on a positive note.

Table setting

Now let's take a closer look at the rules for using individual cutlery. What forks, knives and spoons to use at dinner? The number of cutlery at the table depends on the number of changes of dishes that will be served. There is a simple rule - with each change of dishes, cutlery is used sequentially, starting with those closest to the plate.

You will also need to remember that all devices that are located on the left (and these are always forks) should be held in the left hand. On the right are spoons and knives, which are held in the right hand. If you see that there are also cutlery on the table common dishes, located with the handle to the left, then they should be taken with the left hand. A similar rule is used for devices located with the handle to the right. Now we will describe in more detail how to use certain devices. As we mentioned above, accepted table manners vary on different sides of the Atlantic. So: Europe versus America. Continental style It suggests that the fork should be held in the left hand, with the tines facing down. The knife is held in the right hand, at a level of 3-5 cm above the plate, while the blunt edge of the blade should be held with the index finger. American style The fork is held in the same way as a pencil, with the handle placed between the thumb, index and middle fingers, and the remaining fingers pressed against the palm. To make it easier to pierce food, the index finger is extended and pressed along the back surface of the fork handle as far as possible from the teeth. If necessary, use a knife. Hold the knife in your left hand on your middle, ring and little fingers, your index finger on the blunt edge of the blade, and your thumb on the opposite side of the handle. Using both a knife and a fork is preferable as it allows you to handle food more easily. At formal dinners, two utensils are used for appetizers, salads, main courses, desserts and fruit. A knife should never be held like a pencil. When a fork is used in conjunction with a knife or spoon, it is held in the left hand in much the same way as a knife, that is, its tines point downwards. The spoon is held in the right hand, in the same way as the fork. Food should be eaten from the side of the spoon, it should never be brought to the mouth at a right angle! Important! The spoon or fork should be raised up and brought to the mouth, and not tilted with your head towards the food on it. Do not gesture with instruments.

Spices and bread

Let us separately dwell on the peculiarities of using spices and bread, as the most common and commonly used components of any feast. Rules for using salt and pepper Try it! Before adding salt or pepper to a dish, be sure to taste it. Pass salt and pepper together. Always pass both salt and pepper together, even if you are asked for one or the other. Open salt shakers. Some owners prefer open salt shakers, and they are increasingly used in table settings, often replacing the usual salt shakers with holes.

• If the open salt shaker does not have a spoon, use the tip of a clean knife to scoop out the salt.
• If the open salt shaker is intended only for you, you can take the salt either on the tip of a knife or just a pinch - with your fingers.
• If an open salt shaker is shared by all guests, never take salt from it with your hands or a dirty knife.
• It is customary to place the salt taken from the salt shaker on a bread plate, or on the edge of any other plate standing in front of you.

How to properly handle bread and butter Typically, bread is served on the table in a basket common to all guests at the table.

• If a bread basket is on the table in front of you, don’t be shy - take it and offer the bread to the neighbor on your right.
• If the loaf of bread is not sliced, cut off a few pieces, offer them to the neighbor on the left, and give the rest of the bread along with the basket to the neighbor on the right.
• Do not touch the bread with your bare hands. Use a napkin placed under the loaf of bread in the basket to hold the loaf while you slice the bread.
• It is customary to place bread and butter on the butter plate, which is located to your left. The correct way to do this is to cut or break off a piece of bread of such a size that you can eat it in one bite, spread a little butter on it and eat.
• It is not customary to spread butter on big piece bread, and then take a bite from it.
• It is not customary to hold a piece of bread in one hand and a drink in the other.
• Never take the last piece of bread without first offering it to other diners.
• Some restaurants serve bread with olive oil. In this case, you need to dip small (one bite) pieces of bread into butter and then eat them.
• Butter is usually made in a rectangular shape, so a butter knife has a rounded blade to make it easier to spread the butter, and teeth on the edge of the blade to prick the butter onto them to transfer it to the plate.

Table setting rules Regardless of whether you are organizing a formal dinner or a friendly meeting, the basic rules of table setting remain the same. Try to provide each guest with as much space as possible that the size of the table will allow. Leave small gaps between seats. As we have already written, knives and spoons are always located on the right, forks on the left. Formally, dessert plates should be placed at each seating area - even if they are not intended to be used - you can simply put folded napkins on them. The number of cutlery will depend on the planned menu, but the arrangement will remain the same - forks on the left, knives and spoons on the right. It is necessary to arrange the cutlery in the order in which the dishes are served - the cutlery for the first courses is closest to the plate, and so on - the cutlery for each subsequent dish is further from the plate (sometimes the reverse order occurs). Dessert spoons and forks at informal dinners can be placed on top of the plate, or served after the main course has been cleared. Always serve both a spoon and a fork for desserts. For ice cream, use a standard teaspoon or a long-handled teaspoon. Sorbet, which can be served between courses, is usually eaten with a teaspoon. Up to four glasses are allowed on the table at the same time: for red (large) and white (smaller) wine, for sparkling wines(elongated narrow) and for water (short wide glass).

Rules for serving food at dinner vary depending on the degree of formality of the event. For formal dinners, the following rules apply: food is brought separately to each person present at the table, while the waiter approaches the diner on the left with dishes or drinks. It is acceptable for plates to be filled with food in the kitchen and then taken out and placed in front of each of the guests at the table. At less formal gatherings, the host places the food on the guests' plates, and then they are passed around to everyone present, or the guests put the food on their own plates and pass it on to neighbors if necessary. How to use chopsticks. If you are not confident in your skills in using chopsticks, it is better to practice using them at home beforehand. You need to hold the sticks parallel to each other, in your right hand. The thumb and index finger hold and control the top stick. The middle finger rests quietly between the sticks and serves as a support for the lower stick, which remains motionless. The top stick is moved by the thumb and index finger, and is used to grab food and bring it to the mouth. When you are not using chopsticks, place them to the right of the plate; often there is a special stand for chopsticks. Never use chopsticks to pass food to anyone, and never use chopsticks to point at other people. And in conclusion, let us remind you that as the host of a feast, it is not customary to start clearing the table until the guests have left.

Additional rules and subtleties of table etiquette

• Refusal of a certain dish in case of an allergy to the products included in its composition, or due to restrictions due to diet is possible, but it is necessary to explain to the host of the feast (but not to all guests present) the reason for refusing the dish.
• If you have food stuck between your teeth, you should not try to get it out at the table, even if you have toothpicks. If you absolutely cannot tolerate this inconvenience, you must apologize, leave the table, and remove the stuck food from your teeth in the toilet.
• Lipstick. Leaving traces of lipstick on cutlery and glasses is bad manners, especially not advisable on business lunches. If you have lipstick on your lips and don't have a napkin with you to remove it from your face, walk to the toilet, or grab a napkin from the bar when you approach the dinner table.
• Smoking. Despite the fact that smoking in restaurants is prohibited in our country, you may find yourself in restaurants with smoking areas in other countries, so let’s consider the rules of table manners in this situation. So, even if your table is located in a smoking room, never light a cigarette between courses. The smell of cigarettes significantly affects the taste sensation, and not in the best way. Wait until lunch is over, and only after asking permission from those present and making sure that no one objects, you can light a cigarette. If anyone objects, retreat to the bar. And never use plates as ashtrays.

Hello friends!

Today we’ll talk about table etiquette, how to behave in a restaurant, consider the basic rules of table etiquette at the table during lunch or a special event (wedding, birthday).

I'm sure some of you know the basic rules of table manners, but many will learn a lot of interesting things from this post.

Basic concepts of table etiquette

Etiquette– a set of historically established rules of human behavior in society. The rules of etiquette are based on instilling in people attention, politeness, and respect for each other.

In particular, the rules provide for the ability to behave at the table and use cutlery correctly; both waiters and guests need to know all this. Very often, during your work, guests ask questions regarding these rules; they need to be known and followed.

The most important thing is when you see great amount of various cutlery and plates on the table, do not get lost and observe the following:

1. Each plate or cutlery at the table has its own purpose. The most important rule to remember: all cutlery located to the left of the plate while eating is held with the left hand, and cutlery located to the right, respectively, in the right hand.
2. Start taking cutlery from the outer ones, gradually approaching those that are closer to the plate. In the picture above, first the appetizer fork 2, then the table fork 3, on the right first the knife 9, then for the first course use the spoon 8 and in combination with the fork 3 use the table knife 7.
3. A knife can only be used to cut food on a plate or hold what you take with a fork. The main device is the fork, the knife is only auxiliary, and in no case should you eat from the knife or transfer the knife to your left hand and the fork to your right.
4. When they bring you meat or fish, you don’t need to cut it all into a plate. It is necessary to cut off a piece and eat it, then just cut off the next one, since chopped food cools down faster and loses its taste.
5. When you have poured drinks into glasses, ask to remove those that you will not need during lunch (unless the waiter himself does this). Extra wine glasses clutter the table and can accidentally be caught and broken, so it’s better to remove them from the table.

Basic rules of table etiquette

Additions to the rules of etiquette for waiters

1. If guests ask you to serve some fruit from a common vase, be sure to use tongs or, in extreme cases, a paper napkin. You cannot take fruit with your bare hand and serve it to a guest. You need to take a clean plate from the utility table in one hand, tongs for laying out in the other and put the fruit that you asked for or make assorted on the plate, then put this plate on the guest. Not everyone wants to eat fruit that is served with bare hands; it is not hygienic.
2. If you are carrying dirty dishes(in full view of the guests in the hall), plates on the sink and at the same time a piece of food or a dirty napkin falls from them, do not pick them up with your hands. Go to the utility room, take a broom and dustpan, and only use them to clean up what has fallen on the floor.
3. Give a little more attention to guests of honor, the elderly, and children at the table. It’s just that we often see a picture where, in a company of guests, the waiter finds a young, attractive woman and gives her the most attention, while the birthday boy and the elders at the table feel a lack of attention and this may affect their attitude towards you and the amount of remuneration when calculating.
4. Not all guests know the rules of etiquette, much less follow them, but waiters are obliged to know them and tell guests if they ask for your advice on how to correctly do this or that action at the table. There is no need to smartly and arrogantly teach guests how and what to do correctly until you are asked to do so. You can offend the guest and humiliate him in the eyes of others, be tactful and smart, you don’t always need to say what you think.
5. When you are in a restaurant, learn to behave tactfully, do not shout, do not laugh loudly, do not put your fingers in your nose, mouth or ears, preferably do not cough or sneeze. Control your hands and do not touch different parts of the body with them, try not to adjust your hair in front of guests. Many people do actions out of habit and completely automatically (correcting or touching themselves where they are not needed), which are noticeable to the guest and not very pleasant. Keep this in mind.

There are many more rules of etiquette, I have presented you with the main ones. If you follow them and apply them yourself, you can easily recommend them to guests in the restaurant.

How to use a linen napkin correctly

In addition to the fact that a beautifully folded, starched and carefully ironed linen napkin adds solemnity and aesthetics, decorates the table and gives it a solemn appearance, it also has its main purpose.

The main purpose of the napkin is to protect the guest’s suit or dress from crumbs, accidental drops of fat or drinks.

Before you start eating, take a napkin from the table, unfold it, fold it in half and place it on your lap. If you need to wipe your mouth or lips, or lightly wipe your fingers, feel free to use a linen napkin for these purposes.

It’s no longer customary to tuck in a napkin at the table))

If your hands are too dirty, then you should go and wash your hands thoroughly in the toilet, since you won’t be able to dry them thoroughly with a napkin.

In some Chinese and Japanese restaurants For these purposes, wet warm terry napkins are served; this is very convenient for wiping hands.

Previously, in films, one could see how a napkin was placed at one corner behind the collar so as not to stain clothes while eating. Nowadays this is considered a rule of “bad taste”, times change))

It is also considered uncivil to additionally wipe frage (cutlery) before eating, thereby you do not trust the owners of the establishment. If you doubt the cleanliness of the cutlery, ask the waiter to replace them.

A few more rules for waiters that will increase your tips))

The main thing is to be sincere with guests and follow several rules:

• A friendly tone and smile are your main weapons;
• The guest will always see and appreciate the desire to help;
• Learn to think one step ahead of your guest. If he finishes eating another snack, you should already have a replacement plate ready. If a guest finishes a glass of wine, you must prepare the wine and, after asking permission, refill it. If a guest at a banquet begins to eat crayfish or game with his hands, prepare and place a vase with lemon for his hands. Over time, you will learn to think one step ahead, practice));
• Greet guests and be sure to see them off at the entrance, regardless of the size of the reward.

Now you are familiar with the basic rules of table etiquette and recommendations for their application.

All the best, see you soon!

With respect, Nicholai

Notes on the topic:

Since 1996, he has gained vast experience working as a waiter, bartender, and administrator in cafes, nightclubs and restaurants. I have experience working at banquets, buffets, outdoor events, I know many colleagues in the catering industry, and I am the author of a video course for waiters.

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Discussion: 7 comments

After all, the rules of table etiquette have been tested for centuries, so that the behavior of everyone present at the table is harmonious and rational.

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We set the table for a special event in accordance with the rules of table etiquette - laying out the tablecloth, arranging the dishes, glasses and cutlery.

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I don’t even understand why tipping has become a norm. Include this money in the cost of meals. All these “givings” are killing me. In all places. How is a waiter different from a doctor, a teacher, and finally from me? Everyone does their job and nothing more. Hospital patients do not pay me “tips” for the fact that I provide them with a beautiful park on the territory, flower beds and cleanliness. And even if they paid, I wouldn’t take it. Yes, there are also those who don’t take it. When one person gives money to another, he seems to thank him, but he also puts him in a dependent position and humiliates him. I'm not against rewards, but not in this way. I understand that my opinion is an empty phrase, but nevertheless, I expressed it.

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1. Irina, a tip is gratitude for the waiter’s hard work, it’s not a handout or a bribe))
   Thank you for your opinion, by the way, in medicine the demand for money is practiced on a large scale, at least in Ukraine.

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   1. Now, in almost all restaurants, tips are included in the bill. This is called a service charge. It turns out that it is not the waiters who receive tips, but the restaurant owners. And if so, then let the owners transfer a certain amount to the waiters from this amount, and not try to get additional payment from us, stipulating that we still have to thank the waiter additionally.

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