Table etiquette. Table manners

It wouldn't hurt for each of us to brush up on the rules of table etiquette, and perhaps even learn something new about how to behave while eating. The most important rules of etiquette that absolutely everyone should use.

Each of us notices when in a cafe at the next table someone eats sloppily or secretly wipes their hands on their knees. In the same way, other people notice our mistakes; any behavior is striking and can cause embarrassment. Therefore, it is better to check yourself and correct your own behavior if necessary.

How to behave at the table

An insecure person will fidget nervously on the edge of his chair, a complex person will try to slouch in order to become less noticeable. Sit upright, but so that you are comfortable. Your hands can be placed on the edge of the table or on your knees, and it is better to press your elbows to your sides.

By the way, to learn how to hold your elbows near your body Soviet time They advised me to periodically train and have lunch while holding a couple of heavy books with my elbows. This is necessary so that the correct bodily pattern is formed, and you hold your elbows flawlessly even when you don’t think about it at all.

Naturally, table etiquette at home and restaurant etiquette are somewhat different, However, there are rules that are appropriate in any situation:

• Don't talk too loudly;
• Do not move the fork or spoon with food too far from your mouth;
• You should not make sounds while eating;
• You should eat calmly, without unnecessary haste.

Restaurant

1. The man must let the lady go first, but if a group of men or women goes to the restaurant, then everyone is on equal terms or relies on the initiator of the dinner.
2. If several people are to meet at dinner, and some of them are late, then by mutual agreement with the rest of the guests, you can wait about a quarter of an hour for the latecomers. A longer wait is a sign of disrespect for guests who arrived on time.
3. If you happen to be late, you should apologize and then simply join the others. Shouldn't be attracted special attention to the fact of being late and explain the reason, just join in the table conversation.
4. When a man and a woman meet in a restaurant, the man must read the menu and offer his companion some dishes. For a girl in this case to express her indifference is a sign of bad manners. Etiquette in a restaurant implies the participation of the lady in choosing dishes.
5. In a restaurant, you should not have a conversation in a raised voice or laugh loudly. If this happened by accident, it makes sense to apologize to other visitors and be quieter. Observe table etiquette, and if someone behaves inappropriately at the next table, then you should inform the waiter about it.
6. You need to start eating when the waiter has brought the ordered dishes to everyone present. If the person who is waiting for his dish to be prepared does not mind, he can make an invitation to others to start the meal.
7. It is strictly forbidden to perform hygiene procedures at the table - wiping your face, neck and hands with napkins, combing your hair or applying lipstick. If you need to pay attention to your appearance, it is better to do this in a special room. Table etiquette also does not welcome traces of lipstick on dishes. Before starting to eat, the girl must carefully remove the lipstick with a napkin.
8. Any interaction with food also looks uncivilized - food is on the table to be eaten. Taking photos for Instagram, blowing on the soup, meticulously picking at the salad, commenting on the ingredients is indecent.
9. If you come across a cartilage or bone in some dish, you need to carefully return the inedible element back to the spoon and move it to a plate (or napkin).

How to handle devices

1. Under no circumstances should you check the cleanliness of the cutlery, and if you do notice a cloudy spot on a fork or spoon, you need to quietly draw the waiter’s attention to this oversight and politely ask for a replacement.
2. In most restaurants, the table is set in advance, and the cutlery is laid out on both sides of the serving plate.
3. Don’t be confused if there are more dishes on the table than you expected to see - everything has its purpose, and if you are in doubt about which fork or spoon you should take, you can always see how the other guests solve this problem.
4. Those utensils that lie to the left of the plate are used with the left hand, and those that are laid out to the right must be held in the right hand.
5. When serving complex dishes, each dish requires its own utensils, so if you are in doubt about which fork to take, take the farthest one - the one that is furthest from the edge of the plate. As you change dishes, you will gradually move closer to the closest appliances.
6. The knife is used either for cutting food or for spreading pates and butter (for example, during breakfasts). You should not try pieces from a knife.
7. Meat or fish should be cut sequentially as it is eaten. Cutting the entire portion at once is bad form. It is generally accepted that this way the dish cools down faster and loses its main flavor nuances.

Forks

• Second hot dishes are eaten with a table fork; it has four teeth, and its length is slightly less than the diameter of the plate and is placed on the left;
• a fish fork is used for hot fish dishes, it looks smaller than a diner and has four short teeth, a fish fork is easy to recognize by its indentations - they are needed to separate the bones;
• snack fork - a smaller duplicate of a table fork, used to eat cold appetizers;
• dessert fork - for pies, small, matches the size of the dessert plate and looks atypical;
• a fruit fork equipped with two prongs, usually served with a fruit knife;
• the remaining forks are considered auxiliary, they are placed next to the dish that needs to be eaten with them.

Knives

• Any second hot dish is eaten with a table knife, it is placed to the right of the plate, the blade is turned towards the plate;
• a fish knife is dull and resembles a spatula, used to separate the flesh of fish from the bones;
• the snack knife is small and has serrations;
• the dessert and fruit knife look similar - they are the smallest.

Spoons

• a tablespoon is the largest, lies to the right of the plate;
• a dessert spoon is served with desserts that do not require cutting - soft puddings, jellies and whipped cream;
• an ice cream spoon is served with a bowl;
• the cocktail spoon has a very narrow and long handle;
• a teaspoon can be served with any hot drink;
• coffee spoon is the smallest, served only with black coffee.

Dialogues and behavior at the table

It is worth noting that table etiquette strictly prohibits discussing provocative issues that could lead to a serious conflict - therefore, you should refrain from comments about money, politics and religion.

How to behave at the table and what to say? Be sure to look at the person who is speaking to you, listen without interrupting, and only then respond. If you consider some of your interlocutor’s questions inappropriate for a meal, gently suggest discussing this a little later. In all other cases, you should answer easily and naturally.

The restaurant also does not imply heated arguments - refrain from inappropriate comments and lighten the mood with a sweet joke if someone else raises their voice.

You shouldn’t have a conversation with just the two of you; involve the rest of the meal participants in the conversation.. For example, if the conversation is about a recent vacation, you can ask one of the interlocutors whether he is going to go on vacation in the near future or what vacation spots he prefers.

It is also good form in any table conversation to praise the host, cook or initiator of the meeting - find a few kind words to note the general atmosphere of the evening.

A short course in etiquette

• Do as the majority does.
• Don't point out others' mistakes, as a last resort, you can say this quietly in an undertone and only to your neighbor at the table.
• Don't be away from your meal for too long.
• When leaving the table, apologize.
• Try everything and eat what you like.
• Behind common table do not discuss diet, eating disorders, restrictions on alcoholic drinks and diet.

Table etiquette is not that difficult if you devote a little time to it, and following all the rules will help you present your best side.

tell friends

Agree, everyone has had such a situation in life when you feel awkward at the table. This may be due to the specific society you find yourself in, the environment, a huge amount cutlery on the table. You just don’t know which fork to start with, how to sit, what is appropriate or inappropriate to say, how to get out of awkward situations. Remember the episode from the movie “Titanic”, a simple guy Jack finds himself in sophisticated society, not knowing which fork to start with, he feels a little awkward. He asks the question: “Is all this for me?”

So, correct behavior at the table speaks about the general cultural level of a person. Some people are taught the culture of behavior at the table and in society from childhood, while others simply don’t know everything. Let's figure out together the rules of etiquette at the table, as well as how not to get confused in all this.

Etiquette rules exist to ensure that everyone present feels comfortable. Therefore, first of all, pay attention to your attitude to what is happening - be polite, include “magic words” in your speech - “thank you,” “please,” “I beg your pardon,” “sorry,” etc.

And if you try to follow simple rules of behavior at the table at home, then this will definitely become a habit and, when you come to a restaurant, you will easily, without hesitation, behave “as it should.”

There are several basic rules of table etiquette:

• You must sit straight, without slouching your back, do not bend over the plate, try to look at ease. It is not recommended to sit too far from the edge of the table or too close and place your elbows on the table. This can embarrass your neighbor. You are not supposed to reach across the table - the waiter can put the dish on the plate.
• Always say "please" and "thank you."
• When sitting down at the table, place a napkin on your lap.
• Women are invited to the table first, men sit next.
• If it is a festive event, being late is considered a sign of disrespect and your bad manners.
• While eating, you should not put your elbows on the table - only your hands should be on the table.
• If food is brought to you earlier than others, wait until everyone has their plates - only then can you start eating. You can start eating earlier than others only if the owners do not mind.
• While eating, you must hold the fork in your left hand and the knife in your right, but if you ordered a dish that is eaten only with a fork, then hold it in your right hand. Do not take a fork, knife or spoon too close to the base.
  You cannot take with a spoon what you can take with a fork.
  You can take as much on the fork as will fit on it without falling off.
• Pastu and others pasta They eat by twisting with a fork and helping with a spoon.
• Dough products and bread must be carefully broken off and the broken pieces eaten; the bread must not be cut or bitten off.
• If you suddenly drop any device, ask the waiter to bring you a new one; if you are at home, take or offer a clean device to your guest
• Food should be chewed with your mouth closed. Under no circumstances should you slurp, even if it tastes very good to you.
• Do not eat from a knife - this is a sign of bad taste.
• If you are pouring yourself a drink from a shared container, offer it to your interlocutors first, and then pour it for yourself.
• If you are serving food from a common plate, bring your plate and put in as much as you can eat, do not forget about the guests and offer them a dish too.
• You can tilt the plate with the leftover soup, but only away from you, and it is better to leave the soup a little uneaten.
• It is necessary to cut off such a piece of food that you can eat it at one time.
• There are several taboos at the table: don't talk with your mouth full and don't drink drinks.
• If you accidentally get a piece of food stuck in your mouth, take it out with a fork and put it on a plate (preferably so that no one can see).
• During a conversation, you should not hold a fork or spoon with food in the air, much less swing it - eat it or put it on a plate.
• Do not lean too far towards the plate, bring the food to your mouth; if you drink tea or coffee, you also need to bring the cup to your lips.
• During or after a meal, cutlery should never be placed on the table - place it on a plate.
• Cutlery is used in a certain order - starting from the outer ones, moving closer to the plate.
• If you are expecting a change of dishes and have stopped eating, cutlery must be placed crosswise (so that the sharp part of the knife points to the left, and the fork with the convex side up).
• If you are finished, the cutlery should be placed parallel to each other on the plate.
• Under no circumstances should you lean over another person; if you cannot reach it, ask them to pass you this or that dish.
• If you need to leave during a meal, apologize to your companion.

When should you apologize?

• If you need to blow your nose at the table.
• If you need to clear your throat at the table.
• If you need to go out.
• If you have a piece of food stuck in your tooth and need to use a toothpick or floss.
• If you suddenly start hiccupping.
• If you feel unwell.
• If you have problems with your intestines or digestion at the table.

How to use a napkin correctly?

• As soon as you sit down at the table, you need to put a napkin on your lap.
• If the napkin is large, fold it in half before placing it on your lap.
• If the napkin is small, it needs to be completely unfolded.
• If you need to go out, place a napkin on the table to the right of the plate, hiding the stained areas on it. Don't put your napkin on a chair - you could accidentally sit on it and get it dirty.
• Place your napkin to the left of your plate if you have already eaten.
• For small children, a napkin is tucked into their collar.

How to behave at the table?

• Don't take a bite big pieces, the pieces should be of such a size that you can easily carry on a conversation at the table.
• You can't blow on hot food. Let the dish cool while you go wash your hands or start a conversation.
• Salt and pepper must be passed on together, even if you were asked to pass on only salt.
• If you are asked to pass something at the table, do not pass it directly into your hands, but place it on the table next to your interlocutor. If your interlocutor is sitting far from you, you don’t need to reach across the entire table; ask the person sitting next to you to pass the dish on.
• At the table, moderate your gestures so as not to inadvertently touch your interlocutor or knock over the food.
• Put your phone or other gadget in your pocket before starting your meal - it is not advisable to put it on the table.
• The waiter must leave a tip of 10-15% of the amount of your order (unless, of course, it is included in the price of the food and this is customary in one place or another).

Remembering these simple rules table etiquette, you can easily and comfortably feel anywhere and in any company. Enjoy your meal!

Firstly, how to sit? Not too far from the edge of the table, but not too close either, and naturally, do not put your elbows on the table. There is a small exception for women, when she can briefly lean one elbow on the table, but only in case of emergency, for example, if her arm is tired. You should sit straight on a chair and not bend over the plate. There are no exceptions for anyone here.

Before you start your meal, you need to “deal” with the napkin. A napkin intended for individual use should be unfolded and placed on your lap. While eating, do not wipe your lips with such a napkin; for these purposes, it is better to use paper ones, and only after finishing your meal, you can touch your lips and wipe your fingertips with a linen napkin. Where should I put it then? Just put it on the table.

Even if you've worked up an appetite, don't gobble up food. Eat slowly to enjoy your food even more. Of course, if you like the dish, eat it to the end, but under no circumstances clean the bottom of the plate with a piece of bread. Just imagine that your tablemate will do this, isn’t it a pleasant sight?

WITH common dish The food is taken with common utensils (special tongs, forks, spoons are intended for this) and transferred to a plate. Don't forget to put these devices back in their place. And don’t get confused: only share common cutlery on your plate, but not individual cutlery from a common dish. If the dish is at a fairly large distance from you, do not reach across the entire table; ask the waiter or neighbor to serve it to you.

Feel free to take bread, cookies, cakes, fruits, citrus fruits with your hands
sh; This is exactly how it is accepted. Refined sugar is also included in this category, but if you have special tongs nearby, use them.

Since we are talking about bread, it should be recalled that this is a very delicate product, one might even say that there is its own bread etiquette. For example, it is not customary to bite off a whole piece of bread. It is eaten in small pieces, which are broken off on your plate. Also whole piece It is not customary to spread bread with butter. This is best done by gradually breaking off pieces and spreading butter on each of them. If there is a pie plate next to you, which is specially designed for bread, then put it in it, transferring the bread from the common plate. Place into a pie plate with a clean knife and butter, which is then spread on pieces of bread. They do the same with caviar, only for caviar there is its own device - a special spatula. The pate can be taken either with a knife or a fork. It is also customary to take sandwiches by hand. If they are prepared as a snack, they are eaten with a knife and fork.

Hot snacks from cocotte makers or chillers are eaten with a cocotte fork or a teaspoon. Hot fish is eaten with a fish knife and fork. As a last resort, if there are no special utensils, you can use two table forks.

Now about the soup. It is eaten slowly and silently. If the soup is very hot, do not stir it with a spoon; it is better to wait until it cools down. Use a spoon to scoop it away from you and bring it to your mouth with the wide left edge. If you finish the soup, slightly lift the plate away from you with your left hand. If necessary, crush the dumplings, noodles, and potatoes in the soup with the edge of a spoon. At the end of the meal, leave the spoon on the plate.

Broths are served in cups (bouillon bowls) with one or two handles. From a cup with one handle, the broth can be drunk as tea, and from a cup with two handles it should be eaten with a spoon.

Cold fish dishes are eaten using snack utensils. However, this is what they do with all cold appetizer dishes. But hot smoked fish gastronomy - with the help of fish utensils. In all cases, if the bones get into your mouth, you should carefully and, if possible, unnoticed, remove them with your hand and place them on the edge of the plate.

With the help of cutlery - a knife and fork - they eat natural portioned meat dishes such as pork and
ranny chops, steaks, fillets, splints, liver, etc. In this case, the knife is held in the right hand, the fork in the left. Meatballs, cutlets, chopped zrazy, cabbage rolls, omelettes and others soft dishes where the use of a knife would be unnecessary, eat with a fork, which is now held in the right hand.

Dishes and snacks made from natural meat, cheese, sausage, and ham are not immediately cut into small pieces. This causes the dish to quickly cool down and lose its appeal. It is better to cut off the pieces gradually, naturally using a knife and fork. The same is done with poultry and game.

True, there is an exception for “tabaka” chickens. It is eaten with hands, but at the same time vases or bowls with warm water for rinsing fingers. Usually pieces of lemon or rose petals are dipped into this water. In this case, clean cotton napkins must be served, or, in extreme cases, paper napkins, which are immediately removed at the end of the meal. They also eat asparagus and crayfish.

In general, for crayfish, lobsters, and lobsters there are special devices, which consist of a short fork and spatula. From the body of the crayfish, only the meat located in the claw is eaten. Then the crayfish is turned over on its back, the neck is separated and the meat is picked out with a fork.

Sturgeon, beluga, boiled and hot smoked stellate sturgeon are eaten only with a fork.

Mustard and salt are taken with special spoons. The mustard is placed on the bottom of the plate, not on the edge, on the right side.

Soft-boiled eggs are served in a special glass (poached glass), the shell is lightly broken with a spoon, placed in a saucer, the egg is eaten carefully, trying not to spill the yolk. Scrambled eggs and omelet with ham are eaten with a fork in the right hand, and, if necessary, help with a piece of bread, holding it in the left hand.

It happens that eating needs to be temporarily interrupted. In such cases, the knife and fork are placed on the plate as they were held, the knife with the handle to the right, the fork with the handle to the left. Such cases may be a temporary absence from the table, or the need to drink water, take bread, put a piece of meat, etc.

Let's move on to dessert. For dessert dishes There are special utensils with which to eat sponge cakes, puddings, ice cream, creams, etc. When is dessert served (tea, coffee, confectionery), excess dishes, bottles, glasses, and wine glasses are removed from the table. Vases of brews, sweets, cookies, plates with thinly sliced ​​lemon, sugar, and rosettes for jam are placed on the table. When a cake or pie is served, a dessert plate is placed for each guest, a dessert knife or spoon is placed to the right of it, and a dessert fork is placed to the left. Tea and coffee are placed to the right of the dessert plate, with the handle of the mug or cup turned to the left. The cream is served hot in a milk jug or creamer, which is served on a saucer. Sponge cakes eaten dessert fork, sometimes with a teaspoon, hard cakes that crumble easily, eat while holding them with your hand.

Now let's talk about fruits and berries. Apples and pears are cut lengthwise into 4-8 pieces on a plate with a fruit knife, peeled and the seed nest is removed. These pieces are no longer cut, but bitten straight off. A peach or apricot is taken in the left hand and cut in a circle to the pit, after which it is broken and the pit is removed with a knife. You can cut pieces from the halves, but you can also use whole halves. Bananas are held in the left hand and peeled gradually. Berries (raspberries, strawberries) are eaten only with a teaspoon. Watermelons and melons are served cut into slices with peel. Taking a slice of watermelon from a communal plate, place it on an individual plate, skin side down, and cut thin slices with a fruit knife. The mango is cut in half on a plate, the bone is removed and the pulp is eaten with a spoon. The pineapple is peeled, cut crosswise into thin slices, placed on a plate and eaten with a knife and fork. Oranges and tangerines are eaten by cutting the peel and dividing the pulp into 5-6 parts, from which they are then separated into slices. Fruits from compote are eaten dessert spoon, and with its help they put the bones on a saucer.

Concluding our conversation, I would like to remind you of some obvious things. For example, a teaspoon is only intended for stirring tea. After stirring tea or coffee, they no longer use it, but put it on a saucer. When cutting food, the fork is held obliquely and not perpendicular to the plate. At the end of the meal, the fork and knife are placed on the plate and not on the tablecloth.

Dining etiquette is not limited to just food rules. This concept includes the ability to make a favorable impression on others, the manner of communication, and much more. By these criteria you can always distinguish a well-mannered person. Few people know all the intricacies of table etiquette, but there is nothing to be ashamed of. There are many manuals and articles devoted to etiquette. And it's never too late to learn.

Basic table manners

The rules of human behavior at the table can be called a whole science; they have been developed over years, even centuries, and are based on common sense, hygiene, attitude towards people who share a meal with you, etc. This section of etiquette is perhaps the most important, because Without good table manners it is impossible to succeed in life. Table etiquette is studied in modern business schools and colleges, where future businessmen are trained.

Now we will look at the basic rules of behavior at the table. A man should not sit down at the table until the women sit down or one of the hosts offers to take a seat. As a rule, the man escorts the woman to the table and offers her a seat to his right. And only after that can he sit down himself. He should pay his main attention to the woman sitting on his right, but if a woman is also sitting to his left, then she should not be deprived of his attention. In general, according to the rules, a man must be equally attentive at the table, both to women he knows and to those he does not know.

So, the guests are at the table. But you shouldn’t start eating until everyone has filled their plates. This applies to the first course. When submitting the next one, you do not need to wait until it is offered to everyone. Ladies sitting at the table should be served first. The lady sitting to your right should pour the wine with her left hand. When do they open new bottle, the man should pour some wine into his glass, and then the lady.

It is completely unacceptable to place your elbows on the table, because... You can push your neighbor or his appliance. Elbows, if possible, should be kept close to the body. Only hands can be on the table. You also need to remember about posture. You should not lean over the plate. If the desired dish or object is far from you, you cannot reach for it, dipping parts of your clothing into other people's plates. You need to politely ask them to be handed over to you.

When lunch has come to an end, the fork and knife should be placed on the plate parallel to each other, in such a way that if you imagine the plate as a clock dial, and the cutlery as hands, then they should show the time “ten to four.” In decent establishments, this serves as a signal to the waiter that you have already finished your meal. But he should not put the cutlery away until everyone has finished eating. If you finish eating before the others, then in the remaining time you do not need to move the plate away from you, put them one on top of the other, you can continue the conversation, drink coffee or tea. By the way, about tea. Do not leave a teaspoon in a glass or cup. After you have stirred your tea or coffee, you should put it on a saucer. In no case is it recommended to urge your dining companions on with words or gestures. In turn, if you are used to eating slowly, then at a business lunch it would be better not to finish eating than to force everyone to wait for you.

The rules strictly prohibit making comments regarding the dishes served or criticizing their execution. When the women rise from the table, the man must also rise and stand until they leave the dining room. Then you can sit down.

Another very important rule. Basically, when serving, food is served on the table in common dishes: salad bowls, dishes, plates, which are designed for several people. Food from such dishes must be taken carefully, using special utensils that lie next to it (various forks, spatulas, tongs, spoons). You must try not to drop anything on the table or touch your plate with these utensils. There is no need to pile mountains of food on your plate, it looks ugly. After all, you can always add more of the dish you like. Smearing and kneading food on your plate also looks unaesthetic. This can make others at the table feel disgusted.

Rules of communication at the table

First of all, you need to remember that you shouldn’t talk about business at the table. The conversation should be pleasant and general. If the number of participants is small, then general topics for conversation are chosen; if there are more than thirty guests, then, as a rule, those sitting next to each other talk with each other. The feast lasts on average about two hours, and after it you can talk about business.

There are certain taboos on topics of table conversation. Namely: health (your own or someone else’s), income, family problems, work conflicts. Also, you should not pronounce too long monologues, or be interested in the age and social status of your interlocutors. It is recommended to talk about culture and art, but avoid going deep into the topics to avoid the possibility of an argument or conflict.

It is not permissible to conduct conversations over the heads of those sitting next to you. If you want to say something to a person sitting across from you, you can do this by leaning back, behind your neighbor’s back. When talking to the person sitting on your right, you should not completely turn your back to the person sitting to your left. The ability to listen to your interlocutor is also an important condition for good manners. You cannot interrupt the speaker, you must look at him with attention, showing your interest in the topic of conversation with your whole appearance.

And one last thing. Never talk while food is in your mouth, and also, do not lounge imposingly on a chair.

Serving items.

For a person accustomed to making do with a minimum amount of cutlery, it is sometimes not an easy task to understand the purpose of numerous shiny knives and forks laid out on festive table at his plate.

In fact, everything is not so difficult. We must remember that all devices are divided into main and auxiliary. The main ones are those that are used to eat, and the auxiliary ones are intended for cutting something, putting it on, etc. And further. All cutlery is placed from your plate in the same order in which the dishes are served: soup, meat, fish, dessert. Thus, you should use the device that is furthest from the plate first.

Despite the apparent variety of serving, each item has its own purpose. At the beginning of lunch, there is a snack plate in front of you (sometimes a small dinner plate with a snack plate on it). On the left side of it there may be a paper napkin or a pie plate. Knives are laid out to the right of the plate, forks are laid out on the left side. Dessert cutlery is placed in front of the plate. Behind them are glasses, glasses, wine glasses. There is a napkin on the snack plate in front of you. If lunch involves no first course, a spoon is not included.

It would be correct to hold with your right hand all the devices that are on the right, respectively, with your left – those on the left. Dessert cutlery is taken with the hand towards which the handle of the cutlery is located.

Hold the knife correctly so that the middle and thumb they held it by the sides of the beginning of the handle, the end of the handle rested against the palm, the index finger should be kept on the upper surface of the handle so that they could press the knife down when you need to cut something off. The remaining fingers should be kept slightly bent. Food is cut towards you. But there should not be too many pieces and they should be small in size so that they fit in the mouth.

The fork is taken in the left hand so that the end of the handle rests against the palm, and the fork itself faces down with its tines. Otherwise, it is held in the same way as a knife, only with the left hand. If there are side dishes on the table such as mashed potatoes or porridge, the fork is used as a spoon, i.e. turn over with the tines up, the fork handle should lie on the middle finger, and the index and thumb should hold the fork on their sides. In these cases, food is taken on a fork, helping with the tip of a knife blade.

The spoon should be held in the right hand. The end of the spoon handle should rest on the index finger, and the beginning on the middle finger. If the dish consists of pieces that can be separated without a knife, then only a fork is served and it must be held in the right hand.

The knife and fork are held in the hands throughout the entire dinner - this classic way. There is also an American style of eating that allows you to use these items interchangeably. That is, after cutting the dish, you can take the fork in your right hand and eat with it. While waiting for a change of dishes, the knife and fork should be placed crosswise on the plate. In this case, the handle of the knife should point to the right, and the tines of the fork should be turned down.

How to use a napkin correctly.

According to modern rules etiquette, the napkin should be placed on your lap so as not to stain your clothes if food accidentally gets on it. Sitting down at the table, you need to unfold the napkin, fold it in half and place it on your lap. If you get your fingers dirty while eating, you can wipe them with the top half of the napkin, leaving it on your lap. To blot your lips, you need to take a napkin from your knees into your palm so that the ends turn over in your palms and the napkin becomes shorter, then apply its middle to your lips. Afterwards, the napkin should be placed to the right of the plate. Under no circumstances should it be hung on the back of a chair or placed on a seat.

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self care

She grew up in her father's house, but at heart she grew up as a homeless child. I don't know how to take care of myself. In a kind and important way. Do not know how. My sister was always able to acquire all sorts of benefits - in clothes, shoes, in affection, attention...

Today we will tell you something more serious than things from the series “don’t put your elbows on the table” and “chew with your mouth closed.” Of course, we can’t do without this either: it’s a classic. But I promise you, the set of rules will be divided and strict.

Why table manners matter

I remember at school I had etiquette classes. We learned how to sit at the table, place plates and all that stuff. I don't know why we were taught this. No matter who I asked, everyone said that they did not have such an item. But now I am pleased to participate in various formal meals.

I understand that following the lunch protocol allows you to simultaneously relax, do everything correctly without paying attention to your actions, and have fun. When you know the rules, you don’t feel awkward and biased at the table, you are freed from the need to ask stupid questions like “What should we do about it?” You can just enjoy your meal.

Why you need to observe etiquette

When I began to periodically have the need to eat in public places, I noticed that many people did not have the slightest idea about table manners. This surprised me so much that I don’t even know how to express it. Table manners have been a given for me since my school days. We still eat three times a day, and we need to do it in such a way as not to make others depressed.

At least follow these four rules:

Keep an eye on the owner of the house

If you do everything exactly like him, it will help you avoid shame 95% of the time. It's not that difficult - starting to eat when everyone else starts, using the same cutlery - this is already a guarantee of success. However, constantly staring at others is not the most pleasant option. This way you won’t be able to relax and enjoy your dinner.

Chew with your mouth closed and don't talk with your mouth full

Yes, there is still such a problem. Some types chew without closing their mouth and showing its contents to others. If you have to say something, swallow what's in your mouth first. To always be ready to talk, don’t stuff your mouth, let there be very little food in it - literally just one bite. Gone are the days when people stuffed their mouths in order to be satisfied faster. Your food won't run away from you anywhere

Bring food to your mouth, not your mouth to food

Don’t lean over the fork, much less the plate, scooping food into your mouth, almost like a scoop. Carrying food to the mouth is a distance of no more than 20 cm, it is easy to overcome. Sit up straight, don't scoop too much food into your spoon or fork, and bring your cutlery directly to your mouth. And never drink from a soup cup.

Say "thank you", "please" and "sorry"

These little words are truly magical and you need to use them freely.

The first rule of etiquette is to know who you are dining with and the seating arrangements for your guests.

You need to be prepared. If you have been invited to an official reception, you need to find out how many people will be there and generally what to expect. Dress appropriately and decently; if it is a work meeting, it is important to look professional. This shows respect for the owner of the house, and the impression made can be very important.

If you are going to someone's home, bring some small gift: flowers or a bottle of wine. If you're going to a close friend's house for lunch, it's worth finding out how you can help. Maybe he'll ask you to buy a cake for dessert or something like that. Arrive on time, but not earlier than ten minutes before the appointed time: final preparations are being made.

Informal lunch

This means that there is no specific time when a group of people should sit down at a table and start eating food together. For example, picnics and barbecues: people come, eat and leave at any time. Here the table manners are much more relaxed, but there are a few points that need to be paid attention to.

1. Get yourself a medium-sized portion.

It’s unpleasant to discover that you are able to eat only half of the food that is on the plate in front of you, and because of your zeal someone didn’t get some dish. You can take a refill at any time: there’s plenty of everything, and besides, it’s always a compliment to the person who prepared everything.

2. Don’t double-dip a piece into the same sauce.

If you like it so much, put the sauce on your plate so you don't spread your bacilli.

3. Don’t cut all the meat at once

If you fried something really big, cut off pieces for yourself and everyone around you only once, then cut them again. Otherwise the meat will be dry.

4. Clean up after yourself

Need some reasons?

Informal meeting at the table

You sit at the table, eat and communicate at the same time. Business meetings, Easter and Christmas lunches and the like. There are already places for everyone here. The basic instructions are this: all the pieces are arranged and laid out around the plate: forks on the left, spoons and knives on the right. Start using cutlery from the outside in: first you take the last cutlery, then the one next, etc. A water glass is usually larger than a wine glass.

Formal lunch

When you attend a formal dinner, you are required to wear a suit and, in many cases, a black tie. I won't go into too much detail: you can find this information on other sites. I'll just tell you: don't worry if you're invited. You can learn all the basics in practice in just half an hour. The picture is attached.

Napkin

The napkin is placed on the lap within the first minute after sitting down to eat lunch. There is no need to hook it with the corner of your shirt collar or tuck it into your belt. Just straighten it on your knees (you can open it only halfway, usually this is enough). This will protect your trousers from splashes and various crumbs, and you can also use this napkin to wipe your mouth. When you eat or have to go away, place it neatly to the left of your plate.

When should you start eating?

The safest and easiest answer is when others start. It is often unclear whether it is possible to eat: the hostess and her assistant are still in the kitchen, a couple of guests have gone somewhere and cannot be called. In this case, if the hot dish has already been served and there are at least two people left at the table, you can proceed. If the food has been brought and everyone is sitting, and three or four people have already been served, you can also start (if there are more than four of you, of course. If there are fewer, wait until everyone is served). The main thing is to never eat alone, but you should eat hot food while it is still hot.

If there is a tradition in the house of praying before meals, the owner of the house should read the prayer, and anyone can offer the initiative. The main thing is to express this desire even before everything is served on the table and placed on plates. Toasts can be made at any time when glasses are filled and, with the exception of formal dinners, they can be made by anyone. Guests often toast to the host's hospitality.

Elbows, distant plates and table troubles

As you understand, it is best not to put your elbows on the table, but there is nothing special if you put them on the table when communicating with someone during a change of course or over tea or coffee. Reaching is prohibited. If you cannot get a plate easily (you need to get up and reach the dish) or it is in someone's personal space, ask the nearest person to pass it to you. If something spills, first make sure it stops flowing, and then ask the hostess to help you wipe it up. Then forget about the incident and enjoy your lunch.

What to do if you don't want something

If you just don't want to try it. You haven't tried the dish, how can you know if you'll like it? Always try a little of all the dishes on offer. Sometimes even the most a small piece It’s enough, let the rest remain on the plate - but the hostess won’t be offended.

You are on a diet. Depending on the severity of the diet, you can notify the hostess in advance so that she can prepare something for you personally. You can eat something before this lunch so as not to be hungry and try a little of what you can.

You do not drink. Until recently, I didn't drink at all and had trouble at some dinners where I was expected to drink alcohol. You may be persuaded and even almost forced. What should I do? I’ll offer you a compromise option: make a toast, take a sip, and then barely touch the liquid with your lips. This usually works. When people know that you basically don’t drink, after a while they stop pestering you with this question. Just be persistent, don't give in to persuasion, and everyone will fall behind.

How to say you're done

The best way- place a fork and knife across the plate, as if the hands of a clock show 4:20. The fork lies closer to you with the teeth up, the knife with the blade towards the fork. This is the most convenient position of the cutlery for the waiter to remove the plate from the table without dropping anything.

Parting

Before you leave, thank all the owners of the house. If it was a large event (more than 30 people) and you need to leave urgently, and the hosts are somewhere in the thick of the crowd talking with other guests, you can leave in English and not say goodbye. In this case, it is better to ask a friend to say goodbye for you. However, within 24 hours, be sure to call the owners of the house and explain the reason for your hasty departure.

1. Have fun and allow yourself a couple of drinks, if you want, but don’t get carried away too much and don’t ruin the evening for the hosts. Often there is a dude at a party who has had too much and starts arguing loudly with his girlfriend or making suggestive jokes.

2. Talk to people. Listen to them, listen to what they say, be attentive. If during the last ten minutes you are the only one who spoke, then this is no longer a conversation, but a presentation.

3. Turn off your phone and enjoy the moment. Don't put it on silent: this way you'll check it every five minutes and let others know you have more important things to do. You can live one evening without Twitter and Instagram.

4. Best way to purchase good manners- this is practice. Make them your habit. Teach them to your children and you will never get into trouble.